Gwyneth Paltrow admits she doesn’t know what the f**k she’s talking about on Jimmy Kimmel

Gwyneth If-you-want-to eff-with-me-bring-your-A-game Paltrow was on Jimmy Kimmel last night and Kimmel was prepared to ask her about some of her Goop sh*t. He asked about earthing, squatting to empty your bladder, and of course the jade egg.

Earthing

Regarding earthing, i.e. walking barefoot, Paltrow says she really doesn’t know much, but “they say” (I always love the mysterious they, so learned!) it is some type of “electromagnetic thing.” A thousand scientists sighed in unison. She then breaks into laughter and says, “I don’t know what the f**k we talk about.” So yes, on a “carefully curated” site that provides health information no one has any clue. This I believe. Conversations at GOOP must go like this:

GOOP Editor: “Can we brand it as new or ancient or alternative? Does it have a product?”

GP: “Oh it’s wacky too!”

GOOP Editor: “Great, we’re in.”

Squatting

It was a surprise to Paltrow that GOOP even mentions squatting to urinate. There was lots of giggling. Sh*t woman, if you want to be taken seriously stop with the giggling. Imagine if I were giving Grand Rounds on a subject and when asked a question I couldn’t answer I broke out into giggles? Nothing says have confidence in my health recommendations more than a fit of giggles.

Despite telling Kimmel that she goes to the office every day and that GOOP is her “full-time job” it seemed that Kimmel knew more about the crap GOOP shills than Paltrow. She laughed and said, “I don’t know” about the squatting. Well, hey there Gwyneth I am a gynecologist and I do know. The primary benefit from squatting to urinate is not strengthening the pelvic floor it is relaxation, so maybe get that copy changed. Squatting opens the pelvic floor and provides better relaxation of the muscles for urinating. When women have pelvic pain, or issues getting their urine stream started, or constipation I often recommend squatting to urinate or have a bowel movement.

I do worry about Paltrow’s orgasms, after all she gets so much bad advice about the pelvic floor. Then again, if she is a true snake oil saleswoman she will be ignoring it all anyway and is probably just laughing in her backyard scarfing spray cheese and counting cash.

The Jade Egg

Despite her rave reviews on the practice and her staunch defense of it elsewhere Paltrow couldn’t really talk about the eggs constructively at all. Shocker! She called them a weight and ancient. Of course her critics, like me, have been saying the same thing all along, jade eggs are nothing more than an over priced weights that could harbor bacteria, are untested at the acidic vaginal pH, with harmful instructions. She told Women’s Health, “When I find something I think works I like to share it with people,” What that apparently means is when someone tells Gwyneth Paltrow GOOP can shill it, she’s in.

Kimmel gave her a platform and I do wonder if he would joke so much with someone like Andrew Wakefield or Jenny McCarthy? I know he thinks vaccines are important, perhaps he doesn’t understand the harm of Paltrow and Goop’s campaign of misinformation? Maybe Kimmel thinks it is funny that women with money to burn buy this crap (and it seemed to me he thought the products were marginal), however, the real harm from Paltrow and GOOP is that they are a megaphone for pseudoscience and this lowers the medical I.Q. Kimmel just gave her a bigger megaphone.

People read or hear this sh*t and they come in asking for tests they don’t need, delay care, or worry that their underwire gave them breast cancer. If they hear pseudoscience enough, despite all evidence to the contrary, the falsehoods are easier to accept as truth and the line that distinguishes fact from fiction blurs. This is a bad thing. The lure of celebrity is so great that people who can’t afford it spend money on supplements or jade egg that can’t possibly help them and could hurt them and that is wrong.

Paltrow looked like an uninformed yet effective grifter on Kimmel and her GOOP is looking more and more like multi-level marketing. If they could find a snake oil brand partner I bet they’d sell that too. They’d probably even sell it as a lube made with ancient ingredients and make a killing.