It appears Gwyneth Paltrow does not have a corner on the “rock in your crotch” market as LadyCare, a product apparently not named by Ron Burgundy, is selling a magnet to clip to your underwear with claims that it can cure pretty much everything, from hot flashes to low libido to stress.
Take that you low tech jade eggs!
Several people have sent me the link to LadyCare, a simultaneously preposterous, offensive, and hilarious site, and so I thought it was worth a review.
(Oh, did I say that out loud?)
Magnets for therapy are bullshit
Therapeutic magnets are multibillion dollar industry despite the fact that there is no evidence they do anything but lighten your wallet. Magnets are so useless that even the National Center For Complementary and Integrative Health says they don’t work for pain and the NCCIH suffers so much from on-the-fence syndrome and maybeitis that they almost never say anything is useless!
In addition to the dearth of studies showing that magnets have medicinal value I would like to point out that if magnets worked for anything we would likley know this because people would be liberated (at least temporarily) from pain and inflammation and hot flashes and whatever else magnet grifters say magnets work for by an MRI scan as that, my friends, is one big ass magnet. The magnetic field of an MRI is so strong it causes all the axes of your hydrogen protons to line up and yet it offers no respite for hot flashes (or incontinence, or trouble sleeping or, well, you get the point). Researchers have even done MRIs on women who suffer from hot flashes to try to understand how they impact the brain and no one has reported their therapeutic effects.
Hot flashes are not caused by an “imbalance” of the autonomic nervous system
The LadyCare experts claim that an imbalance in the autonomic nervous system (which their magnet can conveniently rebalance) is the root of hot flashes. Actually (and this is a totally appropriate place to say actually), the pathophysiology of the hot flash is not fully understood. Hot flashes are the end result of multiple factors that narrow the thermoregulatory zone increasing sensitivity to subtle changes in core temperature. While there is evidence to suggest the autonomic nervous system plays a role, so do the serotonergic, noradrenergic, opioid, and adrenal systems.
Does LadyCare understand how magnets work? Do they care?
As I was reading up on magnets (I learn so much writing these posts!) I could not get over the claim that the LadyCare magnet transmits “a static negative pole field.”
What did that mean?
A static magnet is a regular magnet that we all know, like my cat butt magnets.
All static magnets have to have a North and a South pole. If you cut a magnet in half you don’t get a negative magnet and a positive magnet you get a new smaller magnet that is less powerful but still has a negative and a positive. As the LadyCare device is held together through underwear by an invisible force this has to involve a static magnet, however, a static magnet can not have a magnetic monopole. It can’t just be negative.
The physics folks I contacted all basically summed up “static negative pole field” as a word salad. Either that, or someone shattered the laws of physics and instead of submitting their work for a Nobel Prize they are treating hot flashes with magnets in underpants.
So. Many. Questions.
However, one thing is for sure. Don’t waste your money on a LadyCare magnet unless, of course, you fancy one for your fridge.