While reading some news articles for a future post I chanced upon a pure click bait link: Madonna’s vagina selfie

While normally I dismiss those things and move along with a nothing-here-for-you-to-see attitude, I just had to click.

madonna-billboard-music-awards-05-435x580 Screenshot 2014-08-21 07.11.52Partly because I love Madonna and partly because I really wondered exactly what she posted.  After all, this is a woman who published a coffee table book entitled Sex filled with very explicit photos of herself, posed nude for multiple projects (just Google Madonna nude), and has appeared videos, print and many public places wearing very revealing bondage gear. In fact, recently she was at the Billboard music awards looking like she left her skirt at home.

Madonna is clearly not shy about her body. She  celebrates it and uses it in her art. Also, she has a new album coming out and some extra publicity never hurts. Given nude/semi-nude celebrity selfies are practically the norm I was wondering what one-upwomanship she had posted. Honestly, I was expecting something akin to a selfie with a  speculum in her vagina!

The Madonna selfie that has been described as her vagina, explicit, and racy.
The Madonna selfie that has been described as her vagina, explicit, and racy.

This is the picture. Her clothed vulva (for those who need an anatomy lesson). So tame that I looked around online to see if by chance had the wrong one, but nope. This picture generated these headlines…

An explicit crotch shot selfie

“Do we need to see your vagina?” Explicit Madonna crotch selfie angers fans

Her most embarrassing photo yet

Madonna officially desperate enough to take vagina selfies

and of course, Wanna see some Madge Vag.

The infamous Kim K
The infamous Kim K

To call this picture racy given what Kim Kardashian, Rihanna, and Miley Cyrus (to name a few) post on an ongoing basis is ludicrous. Now factor in what Madonna typically wears in public (never mind what she performs in). While her underwear is a little to tight for me (not a fan on the UCT, underwear camel toe) this is tame for most bathing suits and for Madonna it’s practically a nun’s habit. I’ve even posted a similar picture on a post that I wrote on how to get rid of your muffin top!

But as I looked for a more salacious picture I realized that most articles had conveniently forgotten the vast online portfolio of Madonna genitalia, the fact that many celebrities routinely post barely dressed selfies, and focused on her age. That somehow it is desperate for an almost 56-year-old woman to post a picture in her underwear (a woman who has spent most of her career performing in little more than underwear), but just fine for Rihanna and Miley. Since Madonna’s body is amazing the only difference can be her age.

And then of course many of the sites slipped in the fact that Madonna dates men who are a lot younger. So it is just fine was just fine for men to partner with much younger woman (Harrison Ford, Humphrey Bogart, Michael Douglas to name a few very famous ones), but switch the gender and keep the age gap and suddenly it’s worthy of a snide comment? Maybe if Madonna married one of these young men it would be more acceptable.

There’s only one thing that bothers me about Madonna’s selfie and that’s the fact that she deleted it from Instagram.



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  1. Jennifer, as the old L&D nurse, I have to agree. Actually, while the camera is pointed at her pelvis…….I don’t see any part of her vagina in the picture……and I have seen quite a few of those in 25 years of providing nursing care.

    It is undoubtedly the age. I’m married to a wonderful, handsome, sexy man……..who is almost 10 years younger than I am. I hear from new folks that “you’re such a cute couple”……then, after they find out our age difference, apparently we lose some of our cuteness.
    Too bad for them……..I’m the one that got lucky! But….that reaction still surprises me, even after all these years.

  2. Another woman over 50 who’s married to a man closer to 40 – and yeah, that’s no vag. And that’s no SHAME either. If she were on the beach, someone would be saying what an old fashioned bathing suit that is. It’s ageism straight up.

    And yes, please VULVA. Even if it were showing, that’s what it would be. People drive me nuts.

  3. I don’t just “like” this, I love it. So accurate, and I loved the nun’s habit comment. Perhaps “Madonna’s vulva in a habit” would have been a better title for the photo. That picture is the best one I’ve seen of Madonna in years because it is real. Which may be why the reaction was so viral. Remember when Jamie Lee Curtis allowed her hair to remain natural and gray? People were really disturbed by that too. Personally, I wish Madonna would have left her face in as natural condition as her vulva appear to be. But then that would have really pissed people off too.

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