What do you think is high number of sexual partners?

Two? Eight? Not being able to count on your fingers and toes?

We talk a lot about the number of sex partners in the world of STDs, because sexually transmitted infections are a numbers game. The more partners you have, the more potential exposures. And the more potential exposures, the greater the risk of infection and all the sequelae that comes along as a parting gift. For example, we know that oral sex with 6 or more partners results in an 8-fold increases in the risk of oral cancer.

The National Health Statistics Reports (Published March 2011) gives us the answers about the number of sex partners for Americans ages 15-44, although why they stop at 44 I don’t know. I mean people do get divorced at 45 (ahem) and might possibly start dating again. I’m just saying.

The latest report uses data from the 2006–2008 National Survey of Family Growth. The answers are collected through in-person interviews with over 13,000 men and women. The data are collected using audio computer-assisted self interviewing, so the person being surveyed enters answers into the computer without revealing their responses to an interviewer. This method of responding hopefully eliminates (or at least limits) the need to artificially inflate or decrease the number of sex partners based on concerns over reporting real numbers to a live interviewer. The survey has a pretty high response rate: 75%.

The data for opposite sex partners ages 15 to 44 are as follows:

The median number of opposite sex partners for women is 3.2 and 5.1 for men.

88.7% of women have been sexually active with an opposite sex partner and 88.6% for men.

And for the highest number of partners in the study, 8.3% of women and 21.4% of men have had 15 or more partners. While the number of sex partners increased with age, by the age of 24 more than 14% of men and 7 % of women have had 15 or more sex partners.

One interesting demographic for both men and women, is the group most likely to have the highest number of partners (15 or more) are those who have previously been married and are not currently cohabiting, i.e. divorced and dating. While some of that may be a reflection of age, it is hard to know if other factors are also involved (the study simply addressed numbers, not the “why”).

Interesting stats for sure.

I’ll be posting throughout the next week with other interesting sexual demographics from this data set.

What do you think is a high number of sex partners?

240 replies on “How many sex partners do people really have?”

  1. 88.7% of women have never been sexually active with an opposite sex partner and 88.6% for men. ???

    Perhaps that should be “ever” rather than “never”?

    1. Yeah these numbers are a joke, I lost my virginity at 21 and I am now 33 and I was married for 6years. So in 6years after my devorce I’ve had 8 partners one being my curent bf of 4years

      1. what’s the issue with that? 2 years, 24 months, 7 partners, that’s getting laid maybe every other week. big deal. doesn’t sound like a freaky sex life to me, and if she kept any of them on past the first experience, i’m glad they were worth keeping around. i can promise you many of the one night stands i’ve been in, didn’t turn into anything more than that because frankly i wasn’t interested in pursuing it further. god forbid any woman should be sexually secure enough to explore new partners and lose interest! we should all be grateful for male attention in any form right? i experimented a lot, was married 12 years and completely monogomous, divorced and had no relations for years, fooled around a while because i got bored, now abstinent again because the men i meet are so completely small-minded i can’t stand their company, and i’m not just talking about sex. *snore*

    2. I definitely think women under report, but I also know some very lucky girls who met their husbands at 18, and for that reason they’ve only been with 1 man. There’s lots of these girls, and also tons of girls who met their boyfriend/husband in college and only had a couple partners before them. These are the lucky ones, but to say that kind of implies that it isn’t common.
      I’m 34, and at this point the only of my highschool/college friends remaining single. I haven’t been promiscuous by most standards (most grownups forgive a few one night stands.) Generally I didn’t sleep with a guy until I had a solid understanding that we’d be together after it. However, this didn’t always work out and by now my number is around 35. (I don’t know the exact count, because there are some drunken nights in the mix, nothing to be proud of, but I wouldn’t omit any.)
      I found a website that compares your number to others’ numbers, and apparently I’ve slept with more people than 97% of my peers. That made me feel a little dirty, but here’s how I’d explain it if I was ever asked.
      You date someone for a month, you will probably sleep with them. It really is the first step to tell if there will be next steps. So assuming you become sexually active at 18, you have a relationship for several years, then move on. Every 2-3 months, you’ll eventually respond to someone’s advances. And within a month you’ll add another notch into the bedpost. If you assume an average of 4 new partners a year (might sound high, but its probably reasonable in terms of the ability to be over the last guy and ready for a new guy). 10 years of being single with short lived relationships gets you to 40 partners.
      Personally, I’ve had several long periods of abstinence in the mix too. The longest being 4 years, between 25 and 29 years old.
      Now I just want to settle down and get married and have children. This conversation has not ever come up in any of my romantic history, but I’d love to be able to be open about it if it ever did.
      In my opinion there isn’t really such a thing as too many, but it does become extremely frustrating every time you meet a new guy, think he could have the stuff it takes to make you settle, you invest feelings, and it doesn’t work out. The day you’re finally ready to date again, you know there will be at least one more partner in your future. I don’t think people should give up on finding a life partner just because they’ve reached a certain number.

      1. I would think that taking societal pressures into consideration women would have higher numbers than men as a rule. Four example, a man with no job, a single dad with children at home, a guy who isn’t pretty, all three of these make it hard to find a partner. I couldn’t see a man rejecting a woman’s advances if she was unemployed, had children at home ( A guy will sleep with you in the circumstances, he just want to marry you or live with you ), or was only average looking.

  2. I am 43 years old and I stopped counting at 100, I think I am being honest and upfront by declaring this number. I think a lot of people lie and I am about the average

    1. I am 46 and stopped counting at 70-something…..that is because I got married and stopped. If I had not gotten married, I am sure the number would have climbed.

      1. Thank you I feel so much better, I am 49, & just told my Fiancé that my number 90+ and he’s freaking out saying I should be in the guinness book. I told him it was the 80’s sorry

      2. at 50, count is 36 and that’s only after a 20 year hiatus during which i was married and the 2 years after i was divorced when i didn’t even want to consider sex. i definitely personally don’t think that’s particularly high and wonder if women are under-reporting. it’s not like i get laid every day or every week or even every month. i just haven’t had a regular partner, big deal. and no, i have never had an STD–ever.

      1. Woah that’s pretty closed minded of you! I’m 22 and I’ve been with 50 guys since I was 17. My experience is that it just becomes smoother & more natural to go from kissing to sex the more you do it. However I have also found that the more people I sleep with the harder I find it to get turned on by the same guy. Being with someone new is the only thing that excites me now & it saddens me and worries me that I won’t be able to settle down in the future. I actually wish I’d been more careful & selective in the past and kept sex special. I have been abused before though, and I think that is what led me to stop viewing sex as “special”, I partly became promiscuous to numb & block out the bad memories. To sum up; there is no definite judgements that can be made about a big or small number, everyone has different in lifestyle, life experience, personality, principles, psyche, social group/situation, preferences, view on sex etc. Each to their own! Just be happy

      2. Aussie Thinker, STDs are a numbers game. I hope you get some help before the stats catch up with you and you and others die in the process. Raising these numbers will never make you happy, only miserable. Good luck and get some real professional help.

      3. Wow, that was a pretty disgusting remarks to make about someone that you don’t know in the slightest!! How would you feel if I were to say that you must be a virgin, because obviously no one finds you worth fucking? Doesn’t feel so good, does it sweetie pie?

      4. That is a sick comment,you may be a nerd,(and no offence to anyone nerd),If you dont know how to enjoy life,you may be prostituting yourself to other material things in life,and that is a waste.

      5. I’d be willing to bet that your husband or fiancé was sitting next to you when you made that comment. When the coast is clear, please post a truthful comment.

        You lie to your friends, and I will lie to mine, but let’s not lie to each other

      6. It’s funny I’m still getting notifications about this, but while I’m here…

        @AUSSIE THINKER: Thanks for the life story, not that we asked. Live life as you want, I’m simply in agreement with the article that 100 partners is way higher than the average. This is quite obvious if you are surrounded primarily by normal people in your life.

        @JACINDA GROVE: I had over 20 partners at the time I had written that comment, which is higher than average, so your comment brushes past me. I did not mean my comment on prostitutes to be insulting, certainly not “disgusting” as you put it – they’re actually more respectable than the average slut since at least they’re smart enough to earn cash from their promiscuity. Maybe something for you to consider, “sexyhockeygirl”.

        @JORGE: I don’t consider myself a nerd. But FWIW, I’ve known a lot of promiscuous nerds and vice versa. I don’t think there’s as much relation as you think.

        @DEON PACE: I’m a straight male. Not sure why you thought I was female.

        In summary, if by sexual partner we mean someone you have had sexual intercourse with (snogging doesn’t count…), 100 is way higher than average and anyone who genuinely thinks otherwise probably needs to be in therapy. I have known a number of attractive players who scour clubs, Tinder and other venues for their next slay on a weekly basis who are just making it past number 60 in their late 20s, and seeing as most people aren’t like this, I don’t see how anything above 100 can be considered average. But I’d love to talk more with the people who think this, see what they look like, what they do, etc. Not that I pity you because, let’s face it, anyone who can get that much sex that easily is the stuff of envy for most people.

    2. I appreciate your honesty and I am trying to figure this out as well, but I agree with you. Im 51 and my number of partners has been 3 but I consider myself asexual, and I can tell you I had been under tremendous pressure in my younger years to have sex. I was date raped once and assaulted twice but I managed to get away on the last two. There is a lot of pressure on “nice girls” by some men who I would call “sexual predators” because they just want to have sex with as many women as possible. They target “nice girls” and lie about their interests because they want women who are unlikely to have STDs, they were a real problem.

    3. I’m 33 and have been with roughly 60+ partners (mostly male; I am counting both genders). interestingly, my number was 10 when i got married, and around 50 when we divorced–he was gay and I am not and we both needed outlets.

      The declaration of “my number” doesn’t remotely paint an accurate picture of my sexual history, which I think is what’s really bring asked in that question.

      If a guy had 5 partners but was in porn, then that’s high, if he had 50 partners but was not, then that’s not high. To me.

    4. My gf is 26, just got her to tell me how many partnters, keep in mind I’ve been dating her for only a few months, she has had 37 previous partners. I want a serious relationship, and telly digs me and I think she may even love me. What should I do, I really like her, I just cant stomach the fact she’s had 37 partners before me. I don’t want to break her heart but I’m at an impass. Any advice

      1. Blame a partner for having a life before you showed up. It’s also irrational to me that anybody who slept with 100 other people could ever be jealous, but that just shows that you’re human I suppose. As for 100 partners by age 43 being normal, I seriously believe that is high but I don’t know what sort of economic strategy you’re in, maybe you’re 6 foot two and really good looking, who knows? Blame a partner for having a life before you showed up. It’s also irrational to me that anybody who is slept with 100 other people could ever be jealous, but that just shows that you’re human I suppose.

        As for 100 partners by age 43 being normal, I seriously believe that is high but I don’t know what sort of economic strata you’re in, maybe you’re 6 foot two and really good looking, who knows? I am more attractive than average, or so I am told, but I think my prospects have been hampered by economics.

      2. She can’t un-love her ex-partners, what counts is how devoted she is to you now that you have arrived.

    5. I am ashamed of my #, Planned on One and only One!~ Im now in a long term Committed relationship 6+ years now, but I still regret 8! >,<, The Question is the worst thing a guy can ask. This is the most loaded question known to man!

      Nearly all of my failed relationships were due to the man cheating, lying about being married, or having some mental disorder that didn't show up/or was shared with me until the relationship lasted over a year. Average wait time to get intimate was 1-2 years, shortest was 3 months and Im still in that relationship.

      But I feel that if you ever answer the question there is no win. Honestly= A ongoing problem and risk of being devalued by your partner, dishonestly is considered lying. If possible avoid this question or simply ask the guy back and go…Did I disqualify you because of previous relationships? Everyone makes mistakes.

      -All and all in a guys mind he might forgive mistakes and situations where it was not always the woman's fault the realationship failed but no good can come of answering this loaded question wither your number is 1 or … Whatever it is.

      -I got ask the question on #2, he was discusted with me for months. :/ I tend to like guys with little experience as I really don't want a player type and always tried to go with a good possible match with the least possible dating exp, I mean who wants a guy who goes around everywhere and then wants to come home to a virgin and ruin her by giving her a std. -Yuck! Though trying to date virgin men or near virgin's is difficult as they either don't know what they want and leave you-thus upping your number-unless you can wait 3-4 years before sex.

      If i could give anyone advice: It would be Wait until your married, as if a guy loves you enough to hang around that long he won't leave. 3 months, 2 years, 3 years… isn't long enough to wait to have sex. Get the Ring! or risk being devalued and labeled a 'slut'.

      Seriously I have seen women with a number like "2" with such a label. Men are sometimes very unforgiving with past relationships.

      However if you can make it to marrige without any sex- the guy will generally value you more and treat you better. Guys often put women though tests and try to push our buttons to see what kind of women we are. The whole mess can be exausting.

      So far Im in a 5 year relationship and going… If this fails XD I quit! Being single isn't all that bad. # is exact, no l lie here. Still for Age 33 it feels a bit high.

      I never wanted more than 1 and NEVER wanted it to hit 3. I feel like an idot for not choosing the right man to work within those few first attempts.

      Well, more or less I don't persue guys so the options I had were not optimum. I should have never wasted my time as If I had stayed single maybe an equal may have came along eventually. Wait for an intellectual equal or at least someone who values goals, self motivation, and personal achievement equally or you may just end up like me. Wasting your time and dealing with far more stress than dating was worth.

      There aren't too many real men these days- You don't want to be in a relationship when you do meet the kind of guy you would want-Stay Single Unless you meet that great guy!

    6. I fully agree with you. Give me a break 8 partners in your whole life?? Try 8 partners in high school and the first year of college… ridiculous. Most people who aren’t in serial monogamous relationships are dating and having fun going out and meeting new people

    7. I’m a 33 year old dude and I’ve been with 200+ women. I do think a lot of people lie about the number, but face it, we live in the age of the internet where you can get laid any night of the week on a dating site or Craigslist. Monogamy isn’t natural for us anyways. Our closest animal relatives (Chimps and Bonobos – who share almost 99% of the same DNA as humans) are promiscuous and polyamorous. Actually, only 3% of mammals are monogamous, and within that 3% we see some promiscuous behavior. Read the book ‘SEX AT DAWN’ by Cacilda Jetha and Christopher Ryan. It goes more in depth on all of this!

    8. Louise, I am 40 and I think I have had around 160 to 175 ! I was a wild child. Did a few gangbangs for the thrill. I don’t regret my younger years but I would never tell any guy that I was dating !!

  3. I always think with whom are those men having sex if it is not with women ( in this cuestionarie) number are higher for men… Big mouth counts? Women usually are more discrete

  4. You may also be interested in looking at this issue of Journal of Sexual Medicine published in 2010

    They use a national probability survey to get sexual behavior data from the US from ages 14-94. They also have a paper dedicated to sexual behavior among those over 50.

    One interest of mine is to determine whether changes in sexual behavior account for the increases in some STI related disease (ie HPV associated oral cancer)

    1. There is a higher rate of discrepancy in France between men (11.6) and women (4.4). I asked a statistician why that might be and he said that in a random population sample of women they were unlikely to have any prostitutes, but that in France a high number of men visited prostitutes. The secondary discrepancy would be caused by under reporting in women and over reporting in men.

  5. I can’t believe the numbers are that low. I just counted for the last 17 years (I chose that time frame because it is the amount of time I have been living where I am now) and came up with 8. That is, precisely: 4 dating relationships of less than one year, 1 longer one (off and on for several years), 1 one-night stand, 1 serious relationship (a few years), and 1 person I see now. And there were times in which I was seeing nobody. It doesn’t really seem that excessive to me and everyone I know that I know this kind of thing about gets around at least this much unless they are married or something like that. All I can think of to explain low averages is marriage … ? … or is it that the window of ages measured is 15-44, which would skew things low?

  6. I know this is an older post but I hope you can answer a question for me. I recently found out my husband of 22 years was unfaithful.. Very unfaithful. He admitted to never being faithful and very risky behavior with sex workers. He claims that he has not had unprotected sex since 2010. He received oral from a sex worker but “always” protected. Anyway, after revealing everything, I went to my doctor for a full check up & labs. My GYN found genital warts on me. (I was negative 4 years ago when I was pregnant with my daughter). I have had no other partners in 25 years. Anyway, my husband found a wart in his mouth. He claims he has no idea how he got it. That is just “appeared” recently. It is quite large behind his lower lip. His dermatologist removed it but my husband claims it was not tested. He also claims his dermatologist said that since I had a genital wart that I gave it to him in his mouth. This makes no sense to me. If he had one in his mouth then he gave it to me. So how did he get it? You can’t pick it up by drinking after someone. OR touching a chair but could he have gotten it by just touching himself or someone else and transferring it to his mouth? OR did he give oral sex to someone and got it that way? All this HPV information is so confusing. Many sites contradict each other.

    1. Sweetheart I hope u leave that man and it’s obvious he’s lying about everything. Think about it a dermatologist telling him u had warts and gave it to him? Even after he confessed to you about having affairs, he’s still lying. That means he’s not going to stop. It’s time you move on, I’ve been there and you deserve better.

    2. If your husband came to you before he cheated, and asked you for the chance to “swing” or for you all to have an open marriage, what would have been your response?

  7. 25yo gay guy. So far this year (10) months my count has just gone past 100… I don’t have a problem, I just love it!

  8. I’m a 28 year old female, I lost my virginity when I was 13. In 15 years I’ve slept with 35 people. I feel a person becomes sexual promiscuous when they blatantly disregard, the sexual safety of themselves and others.
    Not everyone is at the same place in their lives or has the same values or morals, sexual wants, needs or desires. So it’s quite unfair to place such a varied range of people in one study because then the numbers just become skewed.

  9. Well this article makes me feel pretty bad. I realize now that something is wrong with me & that I do have low self respect.
    I am 17 years old. I have had sex with 19 people. I lost my virginity at the age of 14. I did not have strong feelings for most of my partners & have had mostly casual relationships. I engage in sexual acts without a thought or care & I am totally unprotected.
    Aaaagghh something is wrong with me..

      1. whoaaaa, I was shocked by all these post! my number is low, no where near 100,at about 22, and I’m almost 40, with some years of no sex at all, and my number is counting the little protected pokes from when I was a teenager and in early 20’s. lol and I have only had unprotected with 5 guys on purpose, and 2 when I was in a serious relationship with already, and the others we were leading up to it and close friends . My number grew a little when I lost my first child so that is how I got to 22, and was ready to give up on life. for least 13 years I with a guy and no one else. I’ve had hundreds of guys try to talk to me though, only about 10 percent have even made it to kissing me. I have only kissed 4 guys on the mouth (french kissed), who I didn’t try to kiss me without asking and I didn’t stop. lol. where i live it is rare to be my age with one child and with this little bit of partners. When I tell a guy no I don’t want to have sex with him, and I tell him my history, he is shocked and feel mad. Actual if I have sex with a guy one time, even for a few minutes and it seems to me, he is just looking to get laid, and comes on strong just for sex after that or admit to a history of using women for sex or has said he has been single for a few years, I’m done with him. He is a health risk and not emotionally available. There is no excuse for anyone to be single for some years but having sex. I’m sure there was one person you could of invested at least a year into. I refuse to believe, there was no girl who didn’t want to be in a real relationship with him.

    1. im 19 and have slept with 23 guys, i am not pround of it because most of them were foolish drunkin mistakes, but its nice to know your just as bad lol

      1. How crazy to look at the post now after 1 and a half years. In 1 and a half years my number has more than doubled from 19 to 43. i am 18 now, and will be turning 19 in june. i would like to understand the psychological reasons for this type of behavior, because i am not a healthy individual. i was sexually abused from 5 years old onward. it may have to do with my behavior now, but I’ve never been to a professional to speak about it. like other comments have said, promiscuous sexual behavior is a blatant disregard for one’s sexual safety as well as other’s. I don’t really care what happens to me or any of my partners. Sometimes i really don’t enjoy the sex, and lately its been that way. It’s just a cycle of indifference.

      2. Im 33 and just got to 50. I did lose 5 years of action to marriage. Clearly I need to step it up.

    2. better to chose only one partner in life till death then only you can have total social life enjoyment .and this will give you satisfaction in life psychologically and sexually .test of sex is same why to change life partner every now and then .if there is some communication gap sit to gather and solve it . divorce is the worst things in life should not be happen with any one else.
      I am 26 years Indian young smart guy i have my this view i am searching nice girl who can be with me till end of my life .i will Mary such like minded girl.
      My email who like my view please post hsekhalid@yahoo.com

    3. For goodness sakes start using protection woman! Has no educator ever shown you those STD and STI pictures before? For your own short term and long term health tell him to wrap it up or use a diaphragm. It would be a shame to suffer a serious illness due to carelessness and reckless sex.

  10. I find the low numbers shocking. I wonder how many people still are threatened by the social stigma associated with the numbers. As female in my thirties I did stop counting after approx 120. Do I feel that I am a “whore” as such articles suggest… NO. I am a healthy, safe sex practicing, responsible adult. I enjoy sex. Nothing wrong with that.
    I wish more people were open about this topic.

    1. Not sure how a society can get rid of their sexual taboos , but the debate for monogamy is a model that doesn’t work , at least not for many. I was a virgin male ( by choices , difficult at times) until I was 39 and in the next 10 years , I was with 40 women, 4 women in the last 4 years. Numbers don’t mean a thing

    2. I guess my you are shocked by my number then. my number is 22 and I’m 38 years old and I spent 13 years with one man and my partners include pokes from a teenager, and I have only had unprotected sex with five partners, so this is shocking to you? It shocks everyone I tell where i live, cause NOBODY I know has a number that low and most women in the cities have a bunch of kids by my age. I had my child after married. I was worried my number was high, funny thing is, beside about 6 people, the others were suppose to be in serious relationships with me but cheated on me early on.

      1. I am 20+ and I had sex with 10 partners between the ages of 10 and 20 including my current partner. I’ve been with my partner for 3 years now and the total number of sexual partners I have had has been a big problem in my life/relationship. He abuses me so much emotionally. I have so many regrets. Sigh I wish I had waited on marriage but the truth is I was abused by my grandmother’s bf when I was about 9 and then when I was 10 this boy use to visit my mother n that’s when I lost my virginity at age 10. I am not proud. I feel so bad right now. I’ve only realized my mistakes since I met my partner 3 years ago. He continuously hurts me by talking to soo many girls via fb, whatsapp and he has had sex with a few and claims it’s because of my stupid mistakes from my past. He throws everything to my face. I feel so bad n every time I try to leave him I keep coming back because I love him. I’ve had 2 pregnancies for him. The first was an abortion and I lost the second last year September (twins). I don’t know what to do.

  11. I’m a woman closing in on 23 and surprise, surprise, I’ve never actually had sex with anybody. This isn’t for lack of wanting to, nor is it that I am socially inept or physically unattractive (trust me, I’m not either ;). Every time I’ve gotten close to “doing it”, something has always come up and/or gotten in the way. Alas, that is just how the pieces fall sometimes. I worry sometimes about it because I do want to have sex, but at the same time I realize that there are tons of other items on my list of things to do. I’m sure it will happen eventually though, and after that, who knows how many sexual partners I’ll end up having? Either way, I don’t think that the number is something that anybody should be overly concerned with as long as they are being responsible and using protection.

      1. I wish I was as happy about that as you seem to be. I’ve been with exactly one man in my life, my husband of 24 years. Reading some of these replies, I think I must be the biggest female loser of all time.

    1. i am male 23 …and i am a virgin as well….i know what you are talking about the things on your list…i want to have sex but things just dont align……it will surely happen for both of us ..dont worry and good luck

    2. Brianna , if your first time is in a loving caring and heading towards long term, you won’t fall in the pattern of multiple partners. The desire for sex with a partner as oppose to masturbation is a powerful drive and then the empty , never satisfying search for a sex partner, I did it , but its an empty search , with that said I’m not in favor of monogamy as a societal imposition. I regretted having waited all those years to become sexual active , but that regret came to mind in the loneliest periods of searching myself in the midst my promiscuity.

  12. I’m 26, male and have had no sexual partners at all. I don’t see myself having any in the future either. I find the idea of ending up with a whore uninteresting. I look at the higher number of sexual partners as people not worth knowing, I mean if you’ll treat what is suppose to be an intimate relationship as something you wipe your ass with, well, to be honest, I’m not even interested in calling you an acquaintance. To each their own though.

    1. I was so impressed to read a couple articles about younger people waiting for that special someone before they lose their virginity. I started thinking recently after reading some articles that our country was really promiscuous. But you gave me another view that you should be proud of. With the AIDS and HIV epidemic people should take their health more seriously but too many treat their bodies like their someone elses. God Bless You for being smart.

    2. When a girl is sexually abused at a young age, she usually grows up thinking that sex is either what is expected from a man to show she cares, or she may avoid sex as much as possible. Neither is healthy, but her views may not be due to being a whore, but due to abuse. You may want to consider that fact before you completely discount a woman due to her sexual past. It’s not always black or white.

      1. I totally agree with you. I’ve been abused since I was 4 to my teenage years. I’m now 25. My number is only 12 and I don’t plan to go any higher unless I’m married and it’ll be plus 1. Sexual abuse affects people especially when it starts young. I was only a child and it messed up for years. Ruined my thinking, etc.

  13. I’m a 29 y.o. guy, and I’ve had 21 women that I’ve penetrated. Some great sex, some not so much. My goal before marriage was 100 women, so I’m waaayyyy behind. I was in a relationship for almost 3 years between 26-29. Also, I lost my virginity at age 19. So in ten years of sexual activity, I have a 2.1 women per year average. I’m out of my relationship now, but my current prospectus- not too good. If I want to meet my immature jerkish piggish goal in the next ten years, or by age 39, I have to average 8 women per year. 10 years X 8 women per year= 80 women by Age 39. 80 women plus the 21 I’ve already been with, helps me reach my goal of 100 (101 actually). I think I’ll start prowling some college campuses, see if I can pull some threesomes- knock off some two for ones.

    1. Prowling colleges will NOT get it done. Look to bars where women in their 30s are plentiful. Women in their 30s are extremely easy. Also, 21 partners so far is good, but not nearly enough. 100 might be out of the question, but never give up. Finally, do not live your life with the goal of getting married. Way way overrated. Stay single, have girlfriends, make money, and live. Marriage is not all it’s cracked up to be. After a few years in, you’ll be looking at all the opportunities that have come to present themselves that you cannot act on. I met a woman in a bar in Yuma who was to die for, and I mean TO DIE FOR, but alas, I could not, due to being married. Don’t get married. Also, consider this: how many married men have tried to convince you how great it is? I’ll tell you how many – NONE. Marriage is good for the woman, and frustrating for the man. Don’t do it.

      1. This sounds like GREAT advice, and more up my alley of where I feel I am in life. I’m about to turn 30 y. o. in October 2013, I think in autumn I’ll actually have one of those “Professional jobs” where I’ll be able to get my own place and not have to live with other people, one of my major goals of publishing my novel should be completed by the end of Summer 2013, and I plan on spending this summer working out and getting my body in shape again (I picked up about 20 lbs of fat from my mid to late 20s). I say all of that to say that my confidence is once again starting to build, and I’m almost ready to get back out there and reintroduce the world to the man that I want to become. I’ve been feeling like I “fell off” in my 20s, so I plan on using my 30s to get back on the horse.

      2. lol Im a 43 year old woman and marriage was not good for me it was necessary for the children to have a secure home life but that is all it did for me and barely that. It was good for him because he had someone to take care of him. He has always been like one of my children that need fed and cared for and taken care of not sure how this was at all good for me. And I love sex and he only lasts a few minutes and is done so that wasn’t even good. I would say get married if you want a family and a settled life. If you want to have fun and your freedom marriage is not the way to go. That’s my opinion and that’s for people not men not woman but people in general.

      3. Your number is high for your age and I would stop why ahead and don’t listen to johnm post. You take that road and you’re on your way to get an HIV. WOMEN IN THEIR 30’S ARE NOT EASY. That is basing on assuming they are over the hill. When many women in their 30’s are very attractive cause they are seasoned. Many are career oriented by then and except a guy to have a great job. I know cause I’m in my 30’s. If you are getting them into bed, it’s because you are lying to most of them to do it. Alot of young girls in their 20’s are. I know cause I was 20 once. I spent 13 years of my thirties with no one else.

    2. LOL some people have such silly goals in life. I look at your goal to have marathon-like sex and it makes me laugh. My goal is to help people and make society a better place for everyone. Though I suppose I am not controlled by my ego. ALWAYS PRACTICE SAFE SEX.

  14. Well, I’m 27 and I had only 3 girls and actually I did not even had more than a one month relation. Actually two where one night stand and one was a one month story where she literally told me “we just had sex together”. I wish my future will change I’m so frustrated but I’m always myself and not lying or bearing people I dont like.

  15. I’m a 30 year old male and I’ve been with 43 women in 15 years. In that time period I’ve been in 3 committed relationships for a total of 5 years so I guess the average is about 4 a year. I think any attractive woman my age quoting below 20 is an outright lie since most I have met have had more than one ‘relationship’ a year, date frequently or have multiple guys in orbit. However, I’ve noticed some women tend to come back to me in between their relationships because they don’t want increase their number!

    1. Also men vary wildly in their numbers. I seriously think 20% of the guys are having 80% of the women. I suspect the guys with the highest count have positions with high publicity or work with constantly changing pool of women – so restaurant workers, door guys, promoters, bartenders, military, cops, volunteers, anyone with groupies like musicians, salsa instructors, pro athletes, etc…

      1. You’re probably right. My husband says he’s been with only 3 women in his life. He isn’t ugly either, just introverted.

  16. I’m a 24-year-old male and have had 4 sexual partners since age 16, including a one night stand. 2 of my ex-gfs told me their count: D. had had 18 partners by age 20, and M. had had 28 partners by age 24 (you can’t say they weren’t honest). They admitted, though, that they would tell a smaller number to most people. My point is, men tend to over report and women tend to under report. Do you think the statiscians considered this effect?

    1. I think you’re number is very healthy! I’m (female) with Nr 4 now and hopefully he will be my last. I think men and women are too easy and give up to easy.

  17. I have had sex with around 45 females. I am 21 year old male is that bad? Girls just love my dick. I have only performed oral 6 times.

  18. Lmao at everyone thinking something like, ‘Oh these numbers can’t be true because I, one person among 7 billion, have had X amount of partners. Therefore I am the average’ and ‘I perceive my acquaintances to have had the same if not more, although I have no proof.’ These people either aren’t very bright or joking, and in either case probably overestimating. Quite obviously, too.

    1. Mmmmm…….not so sure about your assumptions either for that matter. By the very nature of the subject matter, there are going to be a whole lot of people who do not answer truthfully for a whole bunch of reasons. So really we all only have our own experience to judge these things on. But it seems from this and other surveys that the more educated you are, the more travelled you are, the more you earn, the less religuous you are and the less concerative you are, the more partners you have had. And as we all tend to associate and socialise with similar people to ourselves our perception of what is normal will be quite different.

      For my part I am an educated, travelled, non-religious, liberal who earns reasonably good money. I am 44 and have been married twice (interestingly over 70% of our friends have one or both partners who have been married twice). I have had well over 120 partners, my wife has had around 100, and the average for the friends that we know about (maybe 12-15 people in our social circle) is up at around the 75 mark. In the main these tend to be successful people – lawyers, businessmen, doctors, architects, entreprenuers and the like.

      As you say the average is taken over samples from millions of people, so it means there are other groups within the sample who are are celibate, or have a single life partner, or who never engage in one night stands or casual sex.

      So an average is just that. But that does not mean any of the respondents are necessarily lying. It just means that your experience is not their experience. I don’t live in a city. I live in a single suburb, so when someone asks me about my view of my city, my answer is going to be very different to someone else who lives on the other side of town.

      But for the record, I have to say I am very happy with my experiences. and I say that without making any judgements about anyone else’s.

      1. I am always surprised when someone acts like sleeping with 30+ women is normal or anywhere near the norm. It is not. The average is unsurprisingly under 10 because normal human beings, which comprise the vast majority, are nowhere near as promiscuous as the typical prostitute. I mean, 100+? That is just fucked up.

      2. By the way, you and your friends are punters, right? That would fit in with the whole image of wealthy professionals in their 40s executing all of these lays.

      3. Thank you for your comment, makes me feel a whole lot better about myself bring 49yrs and female, because my much younger fiancé freaked out about my 90+ number

  19. I am a 44 female. My reply will take longer to read than some of my sexual encounters did. I am facsinated by human sexuality . I have always been curious about the experiences of others and how I compare. Most of what I know is a result of “deck therapy” sessions- aka women and wine evenings! I consider myself to have had few partners: 6 with a few oral sex binges; if those count. Do they??

    I have thought over the years, about my sexual history and the meaning behind the sexual choices I have made. The first few occurances in college starting at age 18, were likely my need to let off steam as a “girl gone wild”. I was a goody two shoes in HS and at home. As a freshmen in college, I was eager to expand my horizons, not as a scholar. Human Sexualtly was my favorite subject along with the psych/soc classes. Close girlfriends quickly noticed a change in my behavior and thankfully brought it to my attention in a kind and caring way. I did a reality check. My sexual activity was not making me feel any better about myself.

    Married sex: “If you put a penny in a jar for every time you have sex prior to marraige, you will fill it quickly. If you remove a penny for every time you have sex once you are married, it will never empty. Things started out great like so many things often do. Neither of us brought much sexual experience/interest/maturity into the relationship. The outcome of our sex: two beautiful children.

    A one night “fling” at the tail end of the marriage “is what is”.

    Post divorce sex: I am older and I know what I want. I feel more confident about me, my body, my mind. I know what does not work; for me. I would like to try a lot of things with one person I can trust, vice versa. I believe my first experiences were a means to challenge my personal boundaries. I needed to see what I could get away with with no parents around to stop me. I wanted to be popular, feel loved. Those experiences were not confidence builders to say the least, but none the less, something I learned from. Post divorce, I have no interest in repeating another “girl gone wild” episode. Maybe this comes with age and maturity. I look at myself differently at age 44 than I did at 18. I have more respect for myself. I believe a man will see this and treat me with greater respect. Interestingly, I am not overly concerned with the man’s number of sexual partners. His experiences may add some excitement! At least that is what my fantasy world sees!

    1. I’m a 36 year old woman thats divorced. My number is 7 so far

      I was married at 20, he was my first. After the divorce I had 2 one night stands then a relationship that lasted for 8 months.

      I was celibate for 8 years — which I don’t recommend by the way.

      then I had 2 more one night stands, a short relationship, and a relationship that lasted a month.

      And I’ve decided to give up — I only ever wanted to have 1 sexual partner in my life — but I can’t seem to find a good match.

      1. Hi i can so relate to your answer i’m 28 year old female and i,ve slept with 7 men and i feel so dirty. I have only ever wanted to have sex with one man so i have also given up. I,ve been celibate for 4 year now and i don’t miss sex at all.

      2. I’m 30. Lost my v card at 28. Been with 4 men in that span of time. It’s not the number of people you’ve had sex with, it’s if they are clean/std free and trust worthy.

        Don’t leave the trust and responsibility of your health and happiness up to them. Till then, good luck 🙂

  20. I am 22 years old and last night I clocked up number 106. This is not a word of a lie. My group of guy friends (5 of us) all add up to around the 450 mark. We think it’s average and normal but we seem to be ahead of the majority of people. (never had unprotected sex either)
    My concern is when I settle down with someone, I’m not going to feel comfortable telling her my number as it will be ridiculously high. In saying this, I think alot of people lie. I tell girls I’ve had sex with 5 or 6 but when I think about it, thats what everyone says.

    1. People lie, but given the conditions of a poll like this one, most of them are probably telling the truth. 5 or 6, or some number around there, is what almost everyone says because it is much closer to the truth than 106. Most famous celebrities don’t even sleep with that many (excepting people like Charlie Sheen). I think the individuals with these astronomically high numbers are either unusually gifted in the art of laying women, or more likely, use prostitutes, which would make it less surprising especially if you have the monetary means to support it. In any case, it probably points to an underlying psychological issue.

      1. I ain’t lying with mine, 22 partners, 38 years old and that is counting pokes from when I was a teenager. 13 years spent with one partner. i’m also not interested in sleeping with any more. I’m not having sex unless I stay married or is married or have a wedding date set. I tried for a few years to be more open and not so strict, which grew my number to 22, (10 more guys) but I realize, having sex with alot of people is not for me. I’m the wifey type, long term only.

    2. I’m reading all these comments and it’s really sad how selfish we really are. I’m not judging because I myself had a period of sexual promiscuity from age 27 to 41. Probably 10 involved intercourse and 30 more were one or two time experiences involving oral sex. I had mostly homosexual encounters but a couple those were female. I waited til I was 27 to do anything sexual because of religious beliefs. I felt like I was missing out all those years by trying to use self control then went wild for a decade. But I still felt empty despite the sexual encounters. No meaningful relationships developed from any of those encounters. I finally revisited my religious beliefs and re-examined myself. All of what I’ve been taught about abstinence and saving oneself for marriage began to seem right after all. I got depressed and disgusted for not trusting in Jesus in all areas of my life and dropped to my knees and asked him to forgive and save me and give me the right attitude about sex and to put a woman in my life to love and marry and raise a family with and to give me wisdom to raise our children properly and learn how to help them when they, too, grow up and are faced with sex, drug, alcohol, or any other addictive behaviors. It’s all a vicious cycle, but I realize God wants us to trust him and His way of doing things when it comes to sex and pretty much anything else. We grow up treating ourselves like we are our own and can do what we want when we want. But as soon as we realize we belong to God we will start looking at how we abuse ourselves as a problem and then start doing something about it. There are some screwed up sexual situations in the old testament, but Jesus made it clear where he stands concerning how we are to conduct ourselves. We must stop looking to social norms and secular psychology as a guide to how to act sexually and stop making excuses. If we want to be happy we can be if we do it God’s way. I believe there are as many sexualities as there are people and even if you feel you are gay there’s a special person of the opposite sex that is the right person for you once you make your mind up to turn your life over to Jesus Christ. As long as we don’t want Jesus in our lives we all will be very messed up in the area of sexuality as well as other areas. I pray for all who struggle as I have and pray for all to develop the right Godly attitude about sex. I’m posting here because I know where I’ve been and know that God has me on the right track. I sometimes look for discussion forums so that I can tell people that our hope in doing better and living happier lives is in Jesus, not sex or some other addiction.

      1. That’s complete and utter bull. I have rejected to stupid religious upbringing (it was not god or jesus that wrote the bible it was primitive men that wanted to control women’s bodies and sexuality) and I have only had two sexual partners as a 20 something. People do not have to turn to religion to love themselves and have self-respect and self-control. If there are underlying problems (like a history of sexual abuse) they need THERAPY. You cannot pray away psychological illness.

  21. I’m a 26 year old straight male and I have had sex with 32 partners. Also, like most other people, I lie about sensitive personal topics such as these. In my experience, you take what a woman says and double it, and you take what a man says and cut it in half. Though you probably still won’t get the right number most of the time, and each person has different criteria by which they do or do not stretch the truth. A lot of people are liars, and even more people are gullible enough to believe them. Only believe what you experience with your own mind; and leave everything else to fiction, unless you are given a good enough reason to trust its validity.

    Also, if you’ve had over a certain amount, say 50, chances are you have a latent STD, a psychological problem, an unhealthy sexual addiction, or all of the above. Seek therapy as soon as possible.

  22. I would much rather be in a position of having too much (assuming no STI) than not having any at all…I’m on the left side of the graph, 27 y/o male…Given how well I did financially, academically, fitness-wise I feel like crap being that bottom 10%. I guess there’s something to be said about the search for novelty after engaging so many partners / the monotony of monogamy but it’s one of those chicken and egg problems.

  23. I also find these numbers far too low. I’m a 42yo male and I’ve had about 160 partners, and my friends always tell me I am too fussy! One of my friends (same age) is less fussy and is at over 1000 now.

  24. I’ve been looking up the average number of sexual partners, and all the results are showing up as this low. I just feel awful about myself now haha. In this past year alone I’ve had about 12 partners, that’s like one a month. I didn’t think it was too much, seeing as I’m in college and just messing around a little, but now I feel terrible. These numbers can’t be right can they?

    I’m guessing that a lot of these are untrue answers. If a guy asks me how many guys I’ve slept with, I get a bit uncomfortable and you might just want to double my answer to get a more truthful amount.

  25. Im a never been kissed virgin whose about to turn 34 in Dec. I am not ugly either.. I work in a public place and am told how beautiful I am almost on a daily basis. A few men have run into walls looking at me. I am told I look about 23. I plan to wait till marriage, and the comments here disgust me. To think of waiting all this time and possibly end up with a guy whose slept with even 5 people is disgusting to me. My parents have always taught me that sex is special and should be privy to those who are married. I love my body and myself and am so glad that I was raised not to let others use me. I wish others could have the same… Virginity is something neither men or women should be ashamed of.

    1. Dear Nonya, thank God there are people like on this earth, who appreciate the advise they received from wise parents. You future husband will appreciate and love you for the fact that you saved yourself for him and him alone. Our bodies are Temples of God, and most people abuse and disrespect them, and it is only getting worse. People like you give hope to the many people who are wondering what they should to about this serious matter. I played football in college and could of had any women I wanted to, but I saved myself for my future wife. I just hope all of the women is was with appreciate the fact that I could honestly say that I was not one to the men that took advantage of them, and I hope their future or current husband appreciates that fact as well. Thank you again, Nonya for taking a stand for the right. Most of the responders are disgusting.

    2. I’m happy for u Nonya biz. For me I didn’t have the support from my parents. Grew up in a single parent home and my mother didn’t set any example either. I was molested as a child n had my virginity taken away by a little low life person who use to come by my yard. I know if I was much older I would have had more understanding but I was only 10 years old. Smh I’m happy for u though. That’s exactly the way it’s suppose to be. It will actually save u from living miserable with ur partner as I am right now. And do believe the right person will come along. Every one has their special someone. Keep it up! 😊

  26. I started to think about my number… So I wrote every name I can think of and I jotted it down…. After I counted each on the paper I didn’t realize it was so many I’m a 28 F with 24 partners… Even after reading all the comments and the 50+ partners I still don’t feel good with myself having 24

    1. better to chose only one partner in life till death then only you can have total social life enjoyment .and this will give you satisfaction in life psychologically and sexually .test of sex is same why to change life partner every now and then .if there is some communication gap sit to gather and solve it . divorce is the worst things in life should not be happen with any one else.
      I am 26 years Indian young smart guy i have my this view i am searching nice girl who can be with me till end of my life .i will Mary such like minded girl.

  27. This thread of comments sounds like STD central. Come on, guys. I don’t care how you view sex or how you have come to view it, you don’t sleep with 50, 100, or over 100 people. That’s sick, and you should seriously get yourselves checked for HIV, HPV, Herpes, and other infections that don’t normally show up until you develop AIDS or die of cancer. You’re practically asking for death or a life-long infection that CANNOT be cured. Was it worth it? Fucking everything that walks? Grow up. Some of you are a disgrace the human species.

    1. I am with you… we are born here for a purpose.. not to just sleep around. Life can be amazing. I had only 2 partners in my life and I’m 40 … I will never have more.. I am very happy and content.

      1. Well, all of these people who are talking about psychological issues that some of us have for wanting or actually having a ton of sexual partners- hey, you guys and gals are probably correct. But, don’t we all have “issues?” Personally, I know that I’ve had connections with many different women in my life, but because I was being a wuss, lacked confidence, and didn’t step up to the plate to acknowledge those connections and signs that they were throwing back at me; I didn’t act out on those obvious connections and let opportunities slip away. Hey, maybe those opportunities would have led to more, maybe they wouldn’t have. But personally, I’m dead tired of dying in my heart and soul over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over again because I’m not living the life I want to, out of cowardice and fear. I’m tired of looking into a woman’s eyes, knowing and feeling EXACTLY WHAT SHE’S THINKING, KNOWING WHAT HER EXPECTATIONS ARE OF ME IN THE MOMENT, FEELING AND CONNECTING WITH HER SPIRITUAL ENERGY… and STILL, LETTING BOTH OF OURSELVES DOWN BECAUSE I’M TOO MUCH OF A MAN-BITCH “MITCH” TO DO ANYTHING ABOUT IT. Call me having a psychological if you want. YES, I HAVE A PSYCHOLOGICAL PROBLEM. I live the life of a coward, but I have the soul of a champion, but instead of living life as Superman, I keep choosing to live like Clark Kent. I know what the problem is, I know how to change it- start living life as I truly desire, as I truly am. So if I want to have 79 more partners at least, so what?? That doesn’t make me some type of less than person, THAT JUST MAKES ME HUMAN. Maybe my life is meant to be different than yours. Don’t judge me.

    2. I agree with you. i was shocked. and I thought my measly 22 at 38 was high, (even the little pokes i counted). lol. I’m also very strict and actually have sex maybe a few times out of year, like 5 times total a year. I’m a very beautiful woman and get alot of attention from me but very rarely say yes. I brought it off with two of the guys, after they failed to tell me they had multiple partners at the time and had slept with 100 women. I was pissed off. they were anxious to enter a relationship with me and have unprotected sex, once they heard my history and yet they were a health risk for me. that was enough to send me back to only wanting sex after a many months in and married or engaged first.

  28. Interesting thread here. I think it is interesting that we are all a product of our environment, our up bringing, our emotional, psychological, and physical attributes. They mold us into what we are. The experiences that we have over the years continue to set the path that we end up walking down. Habits form over time and for reasons that are different for each of us we continue down these paths, sometimes in directions we don’t want to go. For some, the sex is the goal, for others it is the excitement of something new. For others, you will find the manipulative and seductive achievements providing the emotional sense of accomplishment. For some, it is a little of everything.

    For those truly interested in learning and being with those of the opposite sex and use the sexual interactions, sometimes short and sometimes long, to be the conduit to that goal it can be said that those people will truly be in tune with how the opposite sex “ticks”. However, they may not have the emotional fortitude to see themselves as whores or promiscuous beings, nor perhaps should they have to. No one wants to think of themselves as this or that or be shown in a bad light when they look into the mirror at their souls. In my mind, you do what comes natural based on what makes you feel happy. The only person to judge you should be you. Not everyone’s moral compass is pointed in the same direction and what applies for one should not have to apply to all.

    A wise man once told me “In life and sex, those that can…do, and those that can’t…..wish they could”. I was lucky, at least in my mind, to be one that could. The number of sexual partners that I have had is comparatively staggering at over 600 and I am sure I am in the top 1% worldwide. This is said with a flat tone and in no way am a I proud, nor ashamed of that number. Bear in mind that I have never been married and I am pushing 38. This was my choice for the most part due to school, work, and travel but almost married at 24. I many ways I wish I had for I do miss that woman and think of her often. I have averaged anywhere from 3 to 5 a month or more for the last 20 years. Some months there were more and some less. I didn’t really try all that hard. I didn’t wake up everyday and say, “hmm, who can I bang today?” No, not at all; it just has never been that hard for me to meet or talk to a woman. My parents raised me to be a somewhat humble but confident, respectful person and to be attentive to others in sympathy and empathy. I am not a super model by far, but I am told I am handsome with a confident Southern Charm and overall respect for men and women alike. I am average height with an athletic physique. I can’t tan to save my life and really don’t try. I have a great job and a decent amount of money in the bank but by far not a millionaire. In my spare time a few years back I completed a Masters Degree at a reputable University. I have traveled the world and been to places most people have only dreamed about. I can cook, I can clean, I garden, I paint, I skydive, I snowboard, water-ski, scuba dive, wine taste, speak a couple of languages, hike, off-road, and the list goes on and on. I guess the point is that I did my best to live a fruitful life and to be an interesting and healthy person. But the reasons for my thirst for life was that life was short and I wanted to experience many things. The same thought process applies to my love for women. There are so many different forms, shapes, and colors of beauty all over the world and I wanted to experience them. So I did.

    At the end of the day, I have tried to be safe and to avoid STDs; and I will admit I am lucky with my somewhat reckless abandon even though I practiced safe sex. I also find myself finally luckily and am now, in a relationship with a woman that I hope to marry. I have been faithful, though, on occasion I am tempted. Old habits die hard and the habit of having many partners is no different. For a few I am sure they can turn the switch off, but for some it can be difficult.

    For those that have inner turmoil with their chosen path I would say let the societal answer be a loose framework, but choose your own answer. When you decide you need a new path, look yourself in the mirror and decide to change and work at it every day. Rome wasn’t built in a day, and you wont change in a day. You may have hiccups, but don’t let it set you off your new path to being the greatest you that you can be.

    Perhaps you wont find my answer in the text books; but then again, perhaps that is how I like it and how it was meant to be. And if it led me to the woman I am with now, happily together, then it was worth the trip. Cheers to all and good luck…..

      1. I’ve quit counting in regards to sexual partners… I’ve had a bunch of women since I’ve first posted. I lost count. When i first posted, I think I had slept with around 20 or 21, NOW I think I’m around 50. I’m 31 years old. I said I want to have 100 before I get married, BUT I think I’ll have sex with much more than that at this point.

        Here’s the thing… after I get what i want, I usually lose interest quickly, like I’ve been with two of my co-workers and I think they’re both kind mad with me.

        One actually told me to ignore her in school. This was after I had sex with her, and I explained to her BEFORE AND AFTER sex that this thing we’re doing will not develop into anything else. Before sex is was cool with it not being anything more, after sex she wanted us to be more…

        The second co- worker, she’s already sleeping with someone else at work, but I can tell that she’s kinda colder towards me I didn’t really call her or text her that much before I had sex with her. I’m pretty much doing the same thing after sex also. But at one point she asked me to call her more… I did once or twice, but now I’m just back to my old habits of occasionally texting and just kinda saying “Hi” when I see her in the building.

        SO i guess my question is, why can’t it just be an “IT IS WHAT IT IS THING” with some women?? Why do they start acting all funny after we have sex with them.

        I would actually prefer casual relationships where the woman is dating me and other guys, and I’m dating her and other women… we want each other when we want each other, and when we don’t, then we let the other person do their thing.

  29. My 21st birthday is next month, and I have had sex with four people. I have had oral sex with 8 people though, and I have madeout with 28 people. (There is some overlap there). I wish my numbers were lower. I’m married now, so I don’t plan on having any more sexual partners, but my past embaresses me. I had my first kiss at 14, oral sex at 17, and lost my virginity at 18. At 17 I had kissed 4 people, at 19, 28. 90% of the people I was involved with were in one wild, one year period, directly following my brother’s death. He died of an overdose in the same room with me, and he left a big hole in my life. That’s not an excuse but it is a fact. To some people I am a whore and to others I’ve barely dipped my toe in the water. I have friends who are the same age as me who are still virgins, and some who are only a little older, but their count is 70+ No, they aren’t just exaggerating. I know them well, and could name off alot of their sexual encounters by memory. We don’t know all their partners names, and when making a list have sometimes resorted to terms like “Atlanta businessman” and “Asian guy with kitty ears”. I know the name of every person I’ve ever kissed, but I still regret many of my encounters. There is nothing I can do to change my past though. I just hope my current relationship lasts because the idea of being out in the dating world again is horrifying. It is full of lies, manipulation, and regret. Not that I blame everything on the men, there were definitely times when I was just in it for the ride, but there were other times when people played with my heart, and strung me along, for no reason other to be cruel. Liars and cheaters don’t just do it for the sex. I offered most guys friends with benefits, and open relationship situations, rarely pushing for exclusivity. I had men tell me over and over they wanted more, they cared about me, they wanted a relationship, they were serious about me, wearing me down until I said, okay, let’s be together, only to cheat at the first chance they got. That is just cruel and messed up. I finally found someone who really seems to love me, but I am so messed up inside from all the guys who’ve screwed me over, it is hard to believe in him. I am lucky that he is very understanding and sweet to me. To all the people who say they have had many partners, I am all for having consensual fun, but just be honest, guys. Don’t pretend it is something it is not. You can really hurt people, and leave lasting scars.

  30. This thread of comments sounds like STD central. Come on, guys. I don’t care how you view sex or how you have come to view it, you don’t sleep with 50, 100, or over 100 people. That’s sick, and you should seriously get yourselves checked for HIV, HPV, Herpes, and other infections that don’t normally show up until you develop AIDS or die of cancer. You’re practically asking for death or a life-long infection that CANNOT be cured. Was it worth it? Fucking everything that walks? Grow up. Some of you are a disgrace the human species

    Im a never been kissed virgin whose about to turn 34 in Dec. I am not ugly either.. I work in a public place and am told how beautiful I am almost on a daily basis. A few men have run into walls looking at me. I am told I look about 23. I plan to wait till marriage, and the comments here disgust me. To think of waiting all this time and possibly end up with a guy whose slept with even 5 people is disgusting to me. My parents have always taught me that sex is special and should be privy to those who are married. I love my body and myself and am so glad that I was raised not to let others use me. I wish others could have the same… Virginity is something neither men or women should be ashamed of.

    I guess i agree with the above two comments..People who have had more than 100 and 120 are absolutely desperate and sick. and immoral..and dont understand how to be patient..Its as simple as that..

    1. So Kartik you stainless angel – how did your judgemental self find itself on this blog.

      Get off your high horse.


    2. Ur awesome. I’m in love with you already. Sex is indeed a very intimate act and should not be abused. I’m not an ugly guy, and I had many opportunities to have sex with girls. But for some reason I know not, there was always this stop in me, it did not feel right. So I never went through it. I only had sex with my ex girlfriend. Who I was very intimate with and loved. After we broke up, I just never had sex again, I guess I’m waiting until I meet the right girl. Cause I know when I do, all other women will just not matter, there will be no need for this sex thing with other people.

      I sometimes regret, that maybe I should have been more like casanova in the past and maybe I should be like that now, especially I see all the young people having sex liberally. But I can never get off this instinct that it just nor right somehow, I dont know why. Just feels dirty. So girls get really surprised when I decline them, and offended, that perhaps they think I find them not attractive or something. So they never end up calling me again after, or if I do call them after two or three dates, they dont understand why I keep contact with them, and act distant. They usually stop talking to me after they find a dif guy who sleeps with them. But it is not that, its just it does not feel right to have sex when I dont even know you.

      Anyhow, I think the same standards of treating sex more then just a pleasure act should be applied to guys and
      girls. I personally do not respect manwhores, nor will I ever be friends with a man who has committed adultery.

      1. Damn bro I feel the same way
        I’m not bad looking and have a physique to kill for(5’8″ 200pounds with 12% bodyfat) .
        I have girls offering to sleep with me really often
        Instead of sleeping with them I politely decline ask them their address on facebook. I then take a snapshot of their face and keep it in a hidden folder. This shows me the amount of sexual partners I could have had. So far this list has 48 pics of women. Every time an offer comes up and I decline I feel more powerful and the person I’m waiting for more special. I am 22 years old and I am waiting for a girl/woman with similar thinking. I feel sex is the most intimate physical act you can share with your partner and if you have it with just about anyone you are making your partner less special. However I don’t proclaim this to be a new commandment or anything, just the way I think. Good day everyone

    3. These people are sex addicts that have had so many partners. They just never want to admit it. There is help for sex addicts, if they realize that they need help.

    1. I don’t understand how people can have 25, 50, 100 partners and not be damaged by this level of promiscuity, both emotionally and biologically. It seems these people have reduced sex to a sport or contest. How do they connect and build intimacy, if sex is treated so casually? Biologically, I would be disgusted to use a computer keyboard or phone that was used by 25, 50 or 100 people, much less have sex with that many people.

      1. 22 is not high for 40 years old. especially if you are investing a year into each relationship or 3 to 6 months in each or most of them and it doesn’t work out cause of them cheating and lying, and if you are counting even one poke in you or just oral like I am. One guy got mad cause I broke it off cause he wanted to sleep with me and his babies momma and admitted he had 100 partners at 32 years old. He screamed me and said, ‘how dare you talk to me like I’m a slut or something.” I was shocked. cause he was. He looked like robert patterson from twilight so he felt justified to sleep around. I look like a very beautiful version of angela bassett and turn heads every where I go and I don’t sleep around. lol

      2. I’m up to 24 partners, married 3x and not quite 53 years old. I’ve had a ton of long idle times with no sex, and no life partner. Not sure how this would qualify me as promiscuous!

    2. Sorry to point out something from grade school science, princess, but human beings ARE animals.

  31. A very interesting blog. We are all different with many ideas about right and wrong, normal and abnormal. The survey could be very accurate. The many many people with 1 or no partners in their whole life are (apparently) not reading this blog! I will not say what is right and wrong, or what the danger of STD are, or are not (but I will say that death rates from STD in North America are only a small % in relation to car driving or even down hill skiing). I direct medical research at a major university and my wife is a physician.
    I am 65 years old and have been married to one woman for the last 41 years. When we married we were both 22 ans we both had sexually been only with each other. When we were 40 we decided to sexually enjoy other partners (we became swingers). We have stopped counting at 100 others partners, who know the current count (we don’t count). Having other sexual partners has been positive. It has made our marriage better and not worse. They all have not been positive, but the far majority have added to our quality of life.
    This is just one blog entry. It is the witness to our experience.

    1. Great reply, Tim. I’ve dabbled in the swinger community and I think your sentiment mirrors the overall mindset (which also mirrors mine). One man’s moral conflict is not necessarily another’s. For me I’m straight forward and clear about my intentions and everything is consentual. I am engaging in sexual behavior which seems “normal” or natural to me. That’s good enough for me to do it and I do not have one iota of conflict about it. Just like abortion, homosexuality and such. I personally am opposed to abortion and if I impregnated one of my flings I would vote against abortion if my opinion had any weight because it doesn’t set well with me and my notions of God. But casual sex to me is another matter.

      And the STD argument is extremely poor. I got chlamydia in my late 20s when I was much more sexually reserved. I am far, far more permissive sexually today and have contracted nothing that I’m aware of. I probably carry HPV and herpes virus (most people do from what I understand) but have not had herpes outbreak nor have I ever had warts. I’m not going to stop driving a car because once in a while someone gets in a car accident and dies. Nor am I going to stop enjoying the pleasure I derive from having casual sex because it’s remotely possible I might get HIV.

  32. Having read many of the comments here, I’m thinking that there is a tendency for people who believe their number of sexual partners to be high, to seek out information about what is “normal” and what is above that. As someone with a lot of interest in the topic of human sexuality, I’ve spoken to many people and done a fair bit of research into the subject…and I would say the people quoting 50, 100 and above partners ARE the exception vs. the rule. The research supports it. I’m not judging — to each their own — but that also doesn’t mean you should be living in denial and claiming that everyone surveyed is merely lying. I don’t know very many people who have had even 50 sexual partners, let alone hitting the 3 digit mark. Kudos to you, but your numbers are your numbers, and not necessarily representative of “everyone else”.

  33. I just saw the movie ‘What’s your number?’ and have done exactly as SAMBODY suggests! I started googling average number of partners and started to freak out!. I’m 42 years old, have been married and had kids. I lost my virginity at 17, and am in my second ‘long term’ relationship of 5 years. I’ve made my list and average about 1 or 2 per year before I got married. Then a whopping 8 the year after the divorce, a few the year after, and I’ve been with the last one since. My number is 35. It seemed very high before reading this post. But I feel better now 😉

  34. I’m 23 and I have slept with over 100 girls. I was reading a few comments below and I to can’t find any excitement from sex anymore unless it’s with someone new. I fell in love with a girl but I can’t help but for fill the need for different girls. Is this a problem ? Is there anyone I can get help from ? I find myself having meaningless sex. And I can’t talk about this with anyone. My friends praise me to much and I can’t talk to my family about this. I’m not proud of this i just no I have a serious addiction for new and multipal girls. If anyone has overcome this problem please post how they did it. I have lost someone I love and keep falling back down the same path

    1. Not Telling,

      I read your comment and just wanted to suggest to go to a therapist. Are you in college? If you are, you can go to the university counseling center. Sex addiction is like any other addiction – people fall into them because they want to escape from pain or to avoid dealing with something difficult, and the addiction offers a temporary relief (while in the long run damaging your life). A therapist can help you dig underneath the addiction to the root cause, and help you find solutions and healing.

      In the meantime, you can google sex addiction causes and see what information comes up. There are many causes for it – it could simply be an addiction, or it could be caused by a troubled relationship with parents (in particular, females with distant, absent, or abusive fathers often fall into promiscuity due to the subconscious desire to seek the male approval and validation she never got from her father, which is critical to healthy emotional and psychological development), or also from being sexually abused (people who are sexually abused can sometimes try to normalize the abuse subconsciously by sexualizing it and recreating it. They also lose value for themselves and believe the only way to feel acceptance and love is through sex). There’s a plethora of research and information out there, so it will help to just start reading about it and take an honest look at yourself and your life story in order to trace the origins of your addiction.

      Good luck to you – I wish you all the best and hope you find healing and answers. You seem to have a sincere heart, which is a great gift and blessing. Sincere hearts always find their way because they are open to truth and guidance. 🙂

  35. I’m at 24 now… the last one was an ole lady with a phat ass who claims that she’s 33, lol. It was great. I came pretty hard. She said she came too. GOOD TIMES.

  36. 6oral partners means you have a greater chance At cancer ?? I jus don’t believe that. I am not sure about this chart.

    1. I suggest you believe it! The incidence of sexually transmitted HPV related squamous cell carcinoma of the head and neck are most definitely rising. Those stats from New England Journal of Medicine and Otolaryngology journals come from peer reviewed clinical research, not some lame-brain poll off of USA today!

  37. I’m 25 years old, and my number is at 9. And 6 of those were in a one month period after a long relationship, which I regret all but 1 of. I really don’t want to get past 10, so I’m trying to make sure the next person I sleep with is the one. I don’t really judge people by the number of partners they’ve had. Just use protection and make sure to be tested regularly. Casual one nighters aren’t for me, but some people prefer them.

  38. I really need to say this….. I do not understand why males or females false believe they “need” to have sex!!! sex is not a need and having to many different sex partners is filthy and pathetic. Sex is intimacy sex is wonderful but what most doing is “straight fu****’ and this is filthy and makes room to spread STD’s. Many sex partner can cause servile problems to a females body because the guy goes “inside” a females body. STD are real and let me tell you all something. You can get STD through ORAL SEX just as much as through intercourse so do you use a condom? well pray that you didn’t get anything while you gave him head or while you eat her!!!! ever heard about HIV and how to contract HIV. You all need to understand when you sleep with somebody you have sex with all the people that person had sex before you. so lets say the girl you meet hat sex with 25 men well each man had sex with 25 females then you have sex with 624 people while having sex with that one person that’s filthy. Now let me tell you this lady’s listen up. I’m married and yes me and my husband have “unprotected sex” I got pregnant well what I didn’t knew was that I had a std that my husband passed on to me because he cheated. Well the end of this was I lost our child due to this STD and STD can make a female infertile and a male infertile. So please don’t think you do yourself or the world a favor by having many sex partners because you don’t. Many have STD and don’t know it. some have HIV and still sleep around unprotected. To many sex partners causes illness and cause death. Sex was made by God and he made sex ONLY for married people. But then some foolish male once said a male need more then one female it’s his nature so males start cheating on their spouses with other females and those females got comfortable with being used as a sex toy, females got comfortable being the side chick the sideline hoe the stop by hotel for males. I know God knew what he was doing when he said “sex is exclusive” for married people. And if everybody on this earth simply fallowed god’s rules we wouldn’t have cheaters whores easy females one night stand std’s and infertility and much more unpleasant drama. It is so shocking how many females/males so called responsible adults are willing to have sex even unprotected sex with random stranger. You don’t know that person you don’t know if he/she is healthy. Please learn from what I had going through and don’t let people use your body as a stop by hotel it make no difference if you are a male or a female simply because it is not cute or attractive when you had many sex partners and sorry but you are not “the man” because you screwed many females you just like any other hoe. Sex is intimacy and special and should not be shared with everybody that cross your way. me personal I feel disgusted by males/females who change their sex partner more often then they change their underwear. And remember this Condoms ONLY LOWER the risk of getting STD but it doesn’t protect you 100% from contracting one. Lady’s please keep that legs closed no man is worth to get the best of you if he don’t wane marry you he don’t deserve to enter your body. There are “no benefits” from having multiple random sex partners. If you have problems within yourself please seek professional help sex isn’t the way. When you are sexual active you are responsible for yourself and anybody you have sex with. If you know nothing beside his dick size or how her cookie looks like about the person you wane have sex with cut them lose don’t fall for that illusion once reality catches up with you ……you might not like the results/outcome remember you don’t get a reward for doing the wrong things…..God bless

    1. 33Male here
      …..You really wake up one day and say wtf… have i done.
      Ive been in a 10yr 3kids later perfect relationship. But when i was 16 I lost my virginity to one older woman..That alone was a bad move F***** up my head… i didnt have sex again until i had my first kid with my first real gf…when i was 19that lasted a yr…
      From 20-23 i had easily 60 women on a day to day basis… thats what happens when u loose control. ..bar hop and let The feeeling of New partner sex overtake your better judgement.
      Thankfully at 23 I met my kids mom and slowed it all to a screeching hault.
      I asked her once when we met her 22 me 23 she said she had been with 7guys from 18-23. And #8 stopped with me So whatever the statistics tell you… Dont know that i believed it.
      Case @point people are all sex attics and just boils down to the age …. where you are…. who you hang with and morals play a role.

      Keep i mind like thr O.P said Hiv.. Hpv… aids… herpes…warts….all stds are a moment away from gettin ya… keep playin youngsters and you will see.

  39. 28-year-old female here. My number is 18. Been monogamous for a year and a half now. I don’t know why anybody here would be surprised at the high female numbers. You’ve got men all over the manosphere bragging about how they “pump and dump” because they have contempt for women and monogamy. Few guys these days are ready to settle down before the age of 26 or so. When I was 19 and dating guys my own age as I have always preferred to do, the guys liked their relationships in 2-4 month time spans. Out of 28 sexual partners, only five were one night stands. So I racked up the numbers because I refused to date older and more mature men or give second chances to any man who had dumped me, no matter how much they begged later on. Once I turned 26 and began dating men who were 26-28, suddenly committal men were plentiful, go figure. They were scared to end up alone, the pathetic old guy at the bar trying to pick up 20-year-olds and being rejected. So I picked one. And I have been happy ever since.

    It is a bit hard not to resent men at times for the way they behave and treat women in their late teens/early 20’s. But I’m not ashamed of my number or my sexual history. Some of those I was sad to lose at the time have aged horribly due to poor lifestyle choices in their early years. The man I ended up with is much more handsome and responsible:-) And I’ve dated enough to know that most men suck, compatibility is hard to find, and the grass isn’t greener over there, it’s just newer.

    1. I’m at 30 plus now… I started losing count…. It’s 30 something. The last one was a petite young woman in her 20s. A few years ago, a friend of mine told me that “my type” are petite women. At the time, I disagreed with him, because I find something attractive about various types of women. But now I agree with them. My sexual compatibility, leans towards attractive petite women. I just like the feel of their bodies more sexually.

      This adds to my point of having multiple sexual experiences… how will you know exactly what you like, if you haven’t tried a diverse selection?

      Some people may be better for you sexually than others.

      No shame in my game.

      1. I’m 55, been married twice. I’ve had sex with my 2 wives, 3 prostitutes and a casual pickup, so a total of 6 partners in my life.

  40. After reading these threads, and seeing this outrageous high numbers, I’m definitely sticking by my wifey type ways, a ring on it or married or it ain’t happening. I’m glad I’m married.

    1. better to chose only one partner in life till death then only you can have total social life enjoyment .and this will give you satisfaction in life psychologically and sexually .test of sex is same why to change life partner every now and then .if there is some communication gap sit to gather and solve it . divorce is the worst things in life should not be happen with any one else.
      I am 26 years Indian young smart guy i have my this view i am searching nice girl who can be with me till end of my life .i will Mary such like minded girl.
      My email hsekhalid@yahoo.com

      1. Khalid, you are a smart guy. it is better to choose just one partner and stick with her and her alone. It is nice to know there are still decent people out in this crazy world. Don’ give up hope. God will find someone who will be very deserving of someone like you.

  41. I’m 24 years old. I lost my virginity at 16 and I’ve slept with 1 man. The same man I am currently married to and have a child with. While my number is low we have sex about every day. Lol

    1. Chelsea, I am so proud of the two of you, especially you. What a profound statement to make in only a few words. Plato once said, “A wise man speaks because he has something to say, a fool speaks because he has to say something.” You are no fool, and now look how the two of you have been blessed. You have restored my faith in humanity. Thank you for you wise beyond you years remarks.

  42. First of all, I think it is important to remember we are all different in all aspects and some of these comments directed at the more promiscuous posters are pretty judgmental. Some people are really into sex and don’t have traditional mores regarding sex; therefore, by dint of that, they’re probably going to be sleeping around a lot more depending on their accessability to sex/ability to attract sex partners. Sex drive, morals and being female (or a male able to attract sex partners) are 3 major factors that make everyone posting here different and if the sex is consentual I think judgmental comments are myopic and narrow.

    That being said, I think the reported numbers are very, very low, most people are seriously low balling their numbers. I had vaginal sex with maybe 6 women in my 20s. I’ve had sex with at least 100 (like probably about 120) in my 30s. I don’t even think that’s a particularly high number, that’s like 10 a year or less than 1 a month. For me sex is probably my favorite thing to do on the planet (and one of the economically cheapest things to do) and so I find women online who are like minded and don’t want a serious relationship. I have a very, very high sex drive, I think sex is a natural bodily function and have no moral qualms about having sex as long as it’s consentual and I’ve been honest about my intentions. And because I’m attractive with a nice build and a good online reputation as being good in bed, I get more opportunities than most men and I take advantage of that. Naturally, I’m going to have a higher number, I don’t understand why I would be judged in light of all I wrote above.

    1. hahaha, too funny. I literally laughed out loud after reading the statement,”…good online reputation as being good in bed, I get more opportunities than most men…” hahaha, just laughed again. Think much of yourself??? How pitiful that you troll websites looking for hookups and to see what the women are saying about you in bed. I, myself, have been told I am the best ever had, but don’t feel the need to share that “prize” with anything that has a hard dick. Yuck! It takes some Low self-esteem when a person boasts that online women are bragging about his prowess.

      1. LOL, why is it pathetic that I go online to meet up with women? And why does sharing my experiences here equate to my having low self-esteem? Why is my referring to being good in bed an indication of low self esteem when it’s me but heroic or admirable when you do it in your own self-congratulatory manner. Just because you don’t like what I’m saying doesn’t mean I have low self esteem, sorry my good times bother you,lol I’m not asking for your permission I just live my life how I prefer to without having to pander to judgmental control freak hypocrites like yourself.

  43. I just turned 20 and i’ve never even kissed. It’s remarkable how peoples lives can be so different.

    1. I can not understand how people can sleep with 100+ people, it’s just… insane to me. It makes no sense, what type of idiot would sleep with that many people? What are you trying to accomplish, are you trying to beat the world record? Like, what the hell is sex to them? Just a way to have fun? Just a way to meet new people? Their lust is too high, I wouldn’t sleep with a girl of she slept with 10+ guys, let alone 100+. It’s a personal preference, and I believe that I’m better off with that.

      1. Joel, you are absolutely correct. What is wrong with these people. They sound like primitive animals. And when it comes to STDs, we know it is a numbers game, and unfortunately they all deserve what they get. It is nice to know that there others who feel the same way you do. I appreciate the comment. I keep on telling my 5 daughter that no one deserves someone who is a used model when it comes to sex partners.

    2. Dear 123, I am so proud of you. it is all about choices and priorities, and it seems like yours are all in the right order. The right person is being prepared for you; someone a lot like you. You deserve that person, and you patience will have paid off. Your life may be different, but it is must better than some of the true confessions we read. I feel sorry for all of those lost people who brag about their many conquests.

  44. I am a 25 year old female, and I’ve had sex with over 50 guys, and although now I have an STD and a severe case of herpes, I still can’t resist the charm of a sexy man.

    1. Jennifer, You must be a very beautiful person to have been with over 50 guys, and unfortunately for you it is a numbers game, and it sounds like you have lost. I hope you find what you are looking for one day, and I hope it does not kill you in the process.

  45. My numbers are just as high. It can easily be pointed to low self esteem as a psychological factor. You just think sex is a way to show or feel emotion. It’s your way. Who’s to judge you anyhow?
    For you ‘ladies’ or ‘gentlemen’ calling the other derogatory names, all I can say is, I apologize that you feel the need to be so judgemental on the lives of others. The way they express love or emotion has nothing to do with you, nor does it sway the balance of your every day life.
    Now, for those of us who experience. We know this. We know we would never love someone who didn’t satisfy us physically as well as mentally. We know, sometimes, you just want a physical relationship without an emotional connection, and that’s ok. We know, sometimes, the best friendships are firmed from bad sexual relationships. And, we know, most of all…you would never buy a car without test driving it first. Meaning, we would never marry a virgin, that is crazy talk.
    We have an obvious connection with every person we have physical contact with, drunken stupor or not. At some point we found something that clicked, we were made for this.
    Now…When you find your penguin, please stop and put a holster on your activities. It’s totally the right thing to do. Lead with your lips not your hips at that point.

    1. Kelly, I feel sorry for you. No one has to judge you. You did it yourself. You just called yourself a “used car.” And most cars with very high mileage have a lot of baggage that no one else wants. Most people would rather drive a nice classy car out of a dealership than a used car with high mileage any day. Sorry, but you still have some low self-esteem issues. Please get some help, before you kill yourself or others. Ask God to help you as well.

    2. I heard a story in late night crime TV of a drug addict prostitute, that managed to break out of the ghetto and find a job. She then had married a guy (which she then divorced) and had a daughter. As her daughter started to make exactly the steps she did in the past, that shifted her into the prostitution – the mother tried to lecture and resist, because she clearly knew what was bad and wished that to not happen to her daughter. Police then found and has proven that it was the daughter who slit her mother’s throat and killed her. The daughter received a prison sentence for 20 years, and will be in her late thirties when she leaves. With such “rich” background, its pretty predictable where the daughter will end up.

      1. The moral of the story is – apple does not fall away from tree. So much about being judged by the “used car”.

  46. I’m a 28 year old female and I’ve been with 20 different men in the 12 years since I lost my virginity. I always felt bad about my number and would feel insecure about telling a new partner how many men I’ve been with before him. Then, I saw that chart and felt like the biggest whore of all time. However, reading most of these posts makes me realize that perhaps my number is somewhat low.

    1. OMG! That’s exactly my age and number of partners, and years of sexual activity 🙂 I calculated – that’s 1,6 person per year. Since I became aware of the number, (wrote down every name after that stupid “What’s your number” movie) for the past 6 months I live in an agony that I am dirty and not worthy of love. I’m reading this article so that I can somehow reassure myself that I am not some freaky exception and that probably I am somewhat average. Your comment and shared opinion meant a lot to me!

      1. First of all change the mindset and unleash the guilt, You and I and most of us are all worthy. We are human and sensuous beings. I always preferred it when a woman I was in a relationship with, kept an air of mystery about her and her past relationships. I don’t need to know all the past, particularly details. Let’s live for the day, the moment. Of course I was never big on telling my past history. As far as I am concerned it deflates the romance.

      2. I can reassure you, Stela, that you have some major problems with logic. This is not meant as offending. If one foul egg founds most of the other eggs are foul as well, that does not make it a good egg, but rather prove the whole package to be worthless.

    2. Chiquita, At 28 your number is pretty close to average. Your NOT a whore !! Actually its good that you are gaining experience and most likely help you to become a good and faithful wife. Also, NEVER disclose how many guys you have had ! On here its OK because no one knows who you are. My friend married a virgin and the marriage didn’t last long because she realized how much she missed that most single girls experience and she left him. You will be a fine wife someday and that experience is important, just keep that information to yourself.

  47. I’m 36 and didn’t have sex till I was 19. I don’t know my exact number as I quit counting at 200 and that was years ago. I just love women.

      1. Hay Dude that thought that David’s boasting was awesome. I am leaving with you may comment to him which also apply to you Both of you need to get some serious mental help. And I repeat to you as I did David, that I have 5 daughters, and my job is to keep people like the two of you far away from my beautiful daughters. Stop transmitting your STDs to the poor women out there. My comments to David are below

        I love women too, but you are disgusting for making a game out of this. Someday, if you believe in a God or not you will be judged for all of your risky behavior. I am very surprised you are not dead yet with all of the STDs that you have been exposed to. No future wife of yours will appreciate all of the baggage you are bringing with you. You will have to lie to her to impress her. Not the best way to start a relationship. Good luck and I hope you don’t kill anyone before you really figure out what you want out of life. I have 5 daughters, and my purpose in life is to keep them away from people like you.

    1. David Dude, I love women too, but you are disgusting for making a game out of this. Someday, if you believe in a God or not you will be judged for all of your risky behavior. I am very surprised you are not dead yet with all of the STDs that you have been exposed to. No future wife of yours will appreciate all of the baggage you are bringing with you. You will have to lie to her to impress her. Not the best way to start a relationship. Good luck and I hope you don’t kill anyone before you really figure out what you want out of life. I have 5 daughters, and my purpose in life is to keep them away from people like you.

  48. 24 here, have had 0… no sexual experiences of any kind whatsoever (though most of my best friends have been promiscuous women and gay men), not even kissing.. the prospect of being infected with any kind of disease, no matter how trivial or common, carries no appeal whatsoever.

    1. Dear Jane Doe, I am proud of your comments, but more so your lifestyle choices. You are smart to protects yourself from the ravages of STDs. They are getting worse. And there is even an increase in Oral Cancer with the main causative agent being the HPV 16 & 18 strains. Most of people on this site have nothing better to do than boast about their factitious numbers, and those who actually have the above average numbers will never feel good about themselves in the end IF they live long enough Thank you for being a good role model. You will be blessed by your wise choices one day. Keep up the good work and example. At 24 you have a long and wonderful life ahead of you.

  49. From an evolutionary biology perspective, monogamy is relatively new for the human race. “Spreading the seed” is an evolutionary biology way of passing on our genes as humans. The more partners you have, the more chance of continuing your patriarchal lineage. In biology, a successful organism is one that has viable offspring (grandkids). Women must be more choosy about their mates because they have 9 months of pregnancy.

  50. I didn’t start having sex until I was 25. I waited until I received my Bachelors and was accepted to graduate school. I should have waited until I got my Masters and began my career! I Literally gave it up a month after my 25th birthday. I still chose the wrong partner. He was a sociopath ADHD college drop out from LA coming from a dysfunctional family. I was the reserved intellectual from a conservative christian family from NY. He had issues and my first experience was screwed up. I was just lonely as I just moved to a new city across the country and embarked on a toxic six month relationship that left me emotionally drained. It ended and 7 months later I did a one time thing out of loneliness and refused to meet up with the guy again. 9 Months later, I got involved with a colleague. 1 year after that I got with a young divorced colleague and he turned out to be all about drama and acted like a fiesty woman who always gossiped on the phone with his buddy.

    I am 28 years old now and two months ago, I just had my fifth partner. two days after my birthday. However, I usually tell myself four because I don’t like to count the “one time meet up”. He kept calling but thought he was a jerk. Looking back, two of those men didn’t want a serious relationship and I knew they werent people I would normally associate with. They didn’t deserve me.

    The first one I didn’t know any better because he was good at lying. The third one wanted a relationship but I thought he had too much baggage(he didnt tell me he had two kids for a while then I left).

    The fifth one was a working financial professional from Australia with a masters degree.6’4, Athletic, and wholesom. I thought he would be my first long term boyfriend. I waited 4 months to have sex with him. I wanted this one to stay. After that, He ran away because he thought I texted him too much about hanging out and he was constantly busy with his financial job. if he thinks I text too much just because I like him(which I never usually do), I would rather move on and keep my legs shut next time. I got excited for the first time and he left. Moving on.

    I’m just going to get my Masters of Science and start a business. Forget sex and Men. I rather be independently wealthy. I will adopt in my 40s and get a pet.

    1. A very good way to perfectly ruin your life. Start searching for your love – love endures some strong tests. Sex and children will follow up. At 35 you may very well forget having own children, which usually has pretty heavy impact on women psychology, no pets or money can compensate it.

  51. I am 21 and I am a female
    I lost my virginity at 18 and I have had sex with 19 different people.
    Only 8 of them frequent times. So pretty much 11 of them are one night things (even my loss of my virginity). On average I had sex with 4-5 men a year. Which isn’t necessarily bad. The numbers I get from these websites are so unrealistic! Some women are lying because there’s no way men can have that much of a sex drive over younger women.

  52. This article truly underscores that stats obtained via survey are in NO WAY reliable. There is not a chance on earth that these starts are anywhere near accurate. I’m 33 and I’ve had 11 partners. NO WAY that would be considered a slut considering I see people hook up all the time and I have 2 serious relationships.

  53. Do women who have had sex with over 100 people and many threesomes make the best wives and mothers? And the same for men, Do they make the best husbands and fathers?

    If a mate never divulges their former sex life to their spouse is that better than telling all? Maintain mystery. Do most men cringe or accept the idea their wife has been involved in countless threesomes and maybe some of the people in the couples circle have had previous encounters with his wife involving oral and anal sex.

    Also does the number of sexual partners influence mental stability or instability in both men and women.

    These are sound question and would appreciate feedback.

      1. Maybe not Jen, That quantity of relationships may hinder experiencing a healthy, loving monogamous relationship. An individual who has experienced a dozen relationships that say average 6 months in length, is much different than a serial “romantic”. A serial romantic may not have the necessary emotional skill sets to be a loving parent and partner. Not dissimilar to an attention disorder deficit impossible to focus on one relationship.

    1. I absolutely believe the more partners a man or woman have, the ability to have stable, long term relationships is diminished……dramatically. Men and women objectify each other the more sexually active they are ……. men are rated by money and attractiveness; women become objectified by sexual activity and looks. Likewise, men and women with high number counts, are far more likely to cheat, they seem to be addicted to that initial attraction/infatuation.

  54. I am 25, but by 21 I had roughly 20 partners. That’s one every 3 months roughly since 16 when I had my first. That doesn’t seem like it’s all that much, I wasn’t a womanizer and never patroled for prospective partners..

  55. Different strokes for different folks. Some people view sex as some sort of spiritual act and union of body, mind, soul some kind of deeply profound act or whatever. Others just think it’s fun. Others consider it part of a standard date….to judge someone for his/her sexual habits seems excessive. I think a lot of people sleep around a lot more (such as myself) because their sex drives are substantially higher than the average person so naturally we’re going to be more inclined to want to have sex on a date or whatever. I have to laugh at all these comments about how psychologically damaged one must be to have slept with x amount of people. Gee, maybe I just have a high sex drive and truly enjoy sex. Did you ever think of that? I have definitely slept with well over 100 women, I think sex is a natural bodily function and fun as long as its consentual. I don’t feel psychologically damaged at all. I am now in a monogamous relationship, I miss casual sleazy sex but I gave it up because I value my relationship more. I don’t feel as though sleeping around so much damaged me, I don’t think it affected me at all. I mean what is the actual difference in jerking off to porn (which guys do all the time) or substituting that for actually having a real life sexual encounters?

    1. Alex, I think you totally missed the purpose of this article which was about STDs and the more sex you have in a non-monogamous relationship the more likely you will contract STDs which are becoming more and more resistant to conventional therapy. And being the father of 5 daughter, one of my main purposes in life is to keep my daughters as far away from people like you as possible. I honestly feel sorrow for people like you, not because of some psychological damage. I actually could not care less what happens to you, but I don’t think you will ever find someone that you will ever be satisfied with. I hope your monogamous relationship endures.

      1. No, I didn’t miss the point of the article, the subsequent discourse was inspired by the article the content of which included harsh judgment against people like myself who at one time slept around gratuitously and enjoyed it with no regrets. You needn’t worry about keeping your daughters away from me, I’m not a rapist, and I basically steer clear of going down that road with girls that view sex as something beyond what I see it as and I never misrepresent my intentions because I have scruples, just not traditional sexual mores when I’m single and not dating exclusively. So even in my most promiscuous heyday I can assure you nothing would have occurred that would not have been consensual, I don’t role that way. My monogamous relationship continues, it is wonderful and very well may end in marriage. Crazy thing is my girl tells me she doesn’t care if I sleep around, she just doesn’t want to know about it. However, my feelings for her are authentic, I feel fake if I cheat and my conscience gets the best of me so I have chosen to be faithful because my relationship with her has more value than anonymous, sleazy sex. I guess that’s the power of true love, huh?

  56. I’m a female living in the U. S. and I’ve been with over 400 men. Other ladies I know have been with many men too, two I know of that have been with over 300 and 500, from their own accounts. I haven’t seen anyone with numbers as high as ours. When I have told people my number they don’t believe it either.

    1. Do you think you are capable of loving one partner? Do you think that the quantity of partners would make you a better parent or a worse parent? And have you contracted an STD? I could ask the same questions to a male. I believe this is an area that needs further examination. Perhaps quantities or irrelevant or could be detrimental.

      1. I saw that the article was about how many sex partners people have had. I just wanted to tell how many I’ve had. And yes I’ve had chlamydia, trichomoniasis, crabs, garnerella (which is now called bacterial vaginosis and us no longer considered an STD) and herpes. Herpes, as we know, is not curable. I didn’t think I was cool or anything EXCEPT at first when I started having sex, very young (14), because I didn’t know any better. I’m not trying to make an excuse either I just did not know that screwing multiple men would mean anything bad.

      2. And yes I’ve loved one partner every time I’ve been in a relationship. My numerous partners were not a result of cheating.

      1. I am not judging since who on this planet is perfect? At least you are honest and honest with yourself and you survived what you experienced. All you did was participate in intimacy but took risks. I was curious whether individuals who had a significant number of partners could focus on one partner and be a good partner. There are times I wondered if I was capable of this. I have always had a strong desire for intelligent, attractive women even while I was in a relationship. I realize that is not right, I never contracted an STD.

  57. David-I don’t think banging a bunch of women is the same thing as “loving women,” that’s just dumb. Who knows how many women I’ve had sex with, it’s a lot, but I wouldn’t be so corny and fake as attributing it to “loving women” as much as I just love sex. And when I’m single and meet a like-minded female, there’s a good chance we’ll be giving it a shot very soon, maybe within moments if I’m charming enough,lol. As for Robert, you just sound like a control freak. Why do your daughters’ sex lives even matter to you unless they’re minors? I mean if your daughters are minors then good for you, I think it’s very understandable to make sure they’re not being sexually active but from the way you write it seems like you’ll keep the kids tied to your apron strings as long as possible. Kids grow up and discover sex, that’s the reality and I don’t think that’s such a tragedy and they might not necessarily share your outlook on sex. Maybe they will. Does it really matter anyway? To indicate this as a central purpose of your life seems neurotic and unrealistic. But whatever works for you!

    1. I would define a good father as:
      a) those who cares for his children a lot and wishes them no bad things.
      b) those who researches hard on the difference between good and bad using facts only, and then transfers the knowledge unto the children so they learn about this before they get chance to be exposed. There quite a lot of things, which have no-return mark once in contact. Such is best learned by analysis and correct behavior instead of practical exposure under the claims of false freedom. For example, radioactivity.
      c) those who carries the knowledge to his children without loosing their confidence.

      a+b+c – he is a good father.
      you are not. not only you are not sure, you are trying to drag him into the swamp of doubt along.

  58. I’ve been in search and finally found a website … I felt really bad dirty about myself but after reading all comments I’m not the only one. .. I lost my virginity at age 14 , after that I had 4 other people , after that I got in a relationship it lasted four five years things went bad we broke it up and I became promiscuous didn’t care about nothing I had sex with 10 other men, I am 23 now , making the list yesterday night total of 16 guys.. Might’ve forgotten a few .. No more then 20. It feels such a relief to be writing this and to know I’m not the only one. I’ve made my mistakes . And learning . The last person person I had sex was over two months ago. Sigh.. Every single one of them was unprotected. Yes I was stupid I feel less worth .. Lucky I did not catch no std.. Knowing I had so many partners it was a one time thing . I honestly am happy it’s been only two months but I’m not thinking about sex no more. Just want to wait for the right .. I dot. Want to keep adding the list. I’m really close to my mom I wish I had the courage to tell her but I feel so ashame .. Ita a relief writing it down ..But knowing I’m not the only one in the world feels much better . My best friends had sex over 200 men theyre 24 years old and don’t feel bad about it .. So why should I feel bad right ?

  59. I became sexually active at 22. I am now 44 and I have been with at least 16 men and at least 2 women. I attended an orgy once so my numbers are “at least.”

    What’s interesting about my figures is that only 5 of those people were people who I actually wanted to have sex with. The remaining I felt obligated, coecered and/or trapped and the option of “no” never occurred to me.

    What is more interesting, although perhaps not surprising, is that only 3 of my sexual experiences resulted in an orgasm for me. I did not even know what an orgasm was until I turned 36 (it did not occur at the orgy, a woman’s pleasure is not the focus of an orgy).

    Only one of my orgasmic experiences occurred with a person I actually wanted to have sex with.

    These statistics are interesting but I would like to see statistics on satisfaction and particularly female satisfaction. Then I’d like to see the data actually used in a sexual education course that actually teaches something useful.

  60. I am a 38 year old male, & i have only been with my wife. My wife is 36 & she has only been with me. I think this is rare. But she is my everything, & she’s all i need.

    1. Johnny, what a beautiful and powerful statement in such a few short words. Everything and anything else that anyone has ever said about this on this site is meaningless. You have said it all so perfectly. I am not even sure what Church you go to, but I just found this talk on the internet and it was about you and your lovely wife and the blessings that come from being Chaste. The two of you are so blessed. And yes you two are very rare indeed, especially amongst the people on this particular blog, who seems to look at this like lower forms of animals who cannot control their desires and passions. So proud of both of you. You will love the talk. Let me know what you think. I just listened to it and it was very moving and powerful, and you are right in line with the principles he taught. Amazing !

    2. Hello John. No, you are not alone. Can you tell me which nation you and your wife are? Which culture you follow and which religion? Just interesting to know. Below is my story:

      “How many sex partners do people really have?”

      One. 1. My gf and now – wife.

      I am a guy, 31 yo. We got to know each other when I was 21 through a random chat (she was 18). She had also one partner – me and we both lost virginity together. I have no potency or sexual issues. We have regular sex at least twice week, we don’t control each other actions and are fully open to discuss anything. We have two happy children. Had at least two big strikes during our relations, nearly divorced – but we still rejoined and love each other.

      I never went to prostitute, I know the amount of rubbish that passes between their legs.
      I never wanter to meet a girl just out of platonic demand, because such girls either switch their partners quickly – no difference from prostitute on drugs, or are in for the money – no difference from prostitute undercover. I am not atheist, but I am an agnostic and a bit taoist.

      I also wanted to have a good family, where my children could have a happy childhood. Yes, I have some values and so does my wife. Perhaps, this distances us from the mass which engages into random coitus in a quest to get more infections, unstable environment for children and die from STD-caused complications like cancer earlier.

      We are free, happy and we don’t need your mooing – should you feel the necessity to express it.

  61. I can’t believe the amount of bullshitters on this board. And the ones that are telling the truth are very likely sex addicts, people who were abused as children (many admit this) and men that are counting prostitutes in their numbers. Also know a few women who have hit high numbers…bith were abused as children both we’re not very good looking at all.

    1. And RAMD, you forgot to mention that they are a breeding ground or cesspool of some of the most resistant strains of infectious disease microbes on the planet.

  62. I’m a 24 year old male who has had 2 sexual partners. I dated a girl from 15-20 and another one from 21-23. Its been about 2 years now since I’ve had sex, and as much as I want to have sex again, I can’t bring myself to be just another number for some girl who’s slept with everyone who asked her for it. I can’t respect that. I respect your decision and ability to do what you want with your life and with your body, but you have to respect that I don’t have to be the person who puts up with that sort of behaviour. I’m not sure you can have both – the high number of partners and the respect for the sanctity of a relationship.

    The emotional intimacy is a huge part of sex for me and many others, I have trouble separating sex from love; and separating the two is not something I necessarily want to do. I hope to find another girl with a lower number like my own to enjoy the act of intimacy with soon but I’m not going to go sleeping around with every girl I have the opportunity to sleep with just because sex is enjoyable.

    I am also a bit disgusted by how many people report such astonishingly high numbers. Either boosting their own ego or I just think they don’t respect themselves. Yes sex is fun, but why not think long term? If you don’t ever plan on settling down, thats fine, but it goes back to the fact that the kind of genuine, honest guy you probably want to end up with won’t appreciate that sort of behaviour. This isn’t just me saying that – there is a lot of this mentioned in the comments – girls who say “I’ve had 20 partners at 21 and now people won’t date me because of my number.” Well that happens because sex is a very intimate thing, they want to feel like its as special for you as it is for them. If you’re their 5th partner, but they are your 50th, is it any surprise they won’t see you as someone to enjoy dating? This causes a lot of problems in marriages too when discrepencies in number of partners leads to all sorts of problems.

    So if you are one of those girls who has slept with a lot at a young age as I see it there are two options. One, give up on finding a nice guy or a happy marriage later and just sleep with as many as you want. Become one of those girls talking about how they’ve slept with 100, 200, 300+ partners. Or if you want a happy marraige with a nice guy, or even just a happy LTR, save yourself for that person. Sex is a human need, but so is intimacy and reciprocated love. I’d date a girl if she told me “I had 20 partners when I was younger, but since deciding I wanted a LTR I’ve been saving myself for that person” … I would not date someone who said “I had 20 partners and the last one was last week but I’ll totally be loyal with you and you are special to me, trust me!”

    This is one of those things where I simply feel you can’t have your cake and eat it too. Its one or the other. Happy, intimate, loving LTR’s or many many sexual partners. Or just lie and try to get both, but I don’t think thats a serious option as the truth will come out. And I don’t mean to cast judgement on those who do live that sort of lifestyle. But I think one should understand that a lot of those higher number women and men (seriously, read through the comments, I did!) are having trouble finding or maintaining LTR’s – the # of partners, or the mindset behind why they had so many partners to begin with – are likely a key factor there. I wonder if these high-number women and men would have been happier if they saved themselves and met someone and had a happy, monogamous relationship.

    And regarding the stats. I think to even look at an article like this, you are looking for validation. I came here looking for validation that my relatively low seeming number (based on how sexualized society has become) is normal or at least not abnormal. My number is not abnormal and not something I feel ashamed about. When I look around at my peers, there are some casanovas, sure, but the vast majority are people with very few partners. Of my peer group (18-28 y.o. college students) I know several virgins, several who have had a single partner, most are about 3-4 partners. There are tons of studies that support numbers like these. Its important to understand – for all those claiming “100” is a normal number – that most people in the world are not the type to sleep around. If your biggest experience with the opposite sex is trying to get laid – bars, clubs, online dating, wherever – then the pool of people to compare to is skewed. If you limit yourself to comparing yourself to individuals from these venues then you are ignoring the vast majority of society. So you are surrounding yourself with the 10-20% of people who are these >15 partner people per the stats here. That simply means the pool of people you compare yourself to is not a true representation of society as a large, it doesn’t mean that society as a large conforms to your perceived “norms.”

    Do whatever you want. But understand that actions have consequences. Even if you don’t contract an STD, it may affect your ability to find, or maintain, a LTR as you get older. I found this post because I was consoling a girl I know after her bf (she was his 2nd) broke up with her after finding out her number (8). For what I want in a relationship I never felt my number was low, but I also didn’t feel her number was high, so I searched for some stats. I don’t think 8 is unreasonable – if I wasn’t dating for a total of 7 years my number might be closer to that.

    I’ll conclude this rambling post with one thing: If you are worrying about your number – that says something. Ask yourself what you really want and try to figure out if all these sexual experiences are really giving you that.

    1. Great post here! I like you would never go into a relationship wanting “just sex”. Nevertheless I’ve had several people bail on me immediately after our first encounters. I’ve also been divorced once and widowed once.

      My son is 23 and I believe he has had only two partners. I think that at 23 I had only been with three people.

  63. I am a 46 year old woman. I Google this question because I was truly curious. I cannot believe these numbers are real. I have had slightly over 60 partners in the last 7 or 8 years, my total number of sexual partners is close to 200. And no, I’m not a prostitute. I’m proud of it, I keep a record of everytime I have sex, and I measure each and every one of my partners penises (that just started around 2007 though, with my first African). I think women would be a lot happier if they had more sex.

    1. You do understand of course that women who are in monogamous relationships do HAVE LOTS OF SEX and probably more than you do with your 200 partners. I wonder though, how many of the females here who had those extreme numbers in sexual partners orgasmed in each of their casual sexual encounter. That it would be very interesting because i have the feeling that few women do enjoy – orgasm in casual sex.

  64. Interesting.. Virginity lost @ 14… I’m 37 years old and stop counting at about 200.. Have one daughter. Never been married and don’t care for it.

  65. I’m 19 years old and in only this January I have had 3 different sexual partners. I had sex only once with each of them then left. (It’s like one night stand.) There were 2 times that were unprotected sex. Until now my number is 4 partners. I judge myself a lot since I couldn’t control my sexual need. And now I’m sitting at home and being worried about the risk of STDs or HIV/AIDS. I don’t have any symptoms of these diseases but I still wonder of my number is normal at my age and if the risk of STDs/HIV is obviously way higher now for me.

  66. I am 25 and my number is well over 300. I actually think my number is higher than most because during my college years, I actively participated in gangbangs. In fact, my number is probably over 400 because I honestly lost track of the number of dicks inside me (no joke, there were so many men that I wasn’t sure how many were new and how many repeated).

    I am not ashamed of my number, not at all. I adore men and I love sex. I have been called many names, most notably slut or whore, and there have been plenty of men who just wanted sex once they found out my number. Name calling does not bother me & if a man just wants sex from me, so be it. We’re two consenting adults, so what’s the problem?

    No, I don’t always make a man wear a condom but I have been tested. In fact, because I’m very sexually active, I get tested every 6 months & I have always been negative.

    If a man judges me and doesn’t want to be with me because I’m a “whore,” then I move on. I cannot change my past nor the number and type of my experiences.

    Call me what you will, judge me how you want. I am a grown woman and I stand by my words.

    1. Do you think that experiencing this number of partners would hinder or help a relationship? Also would you be honest with a husband, for instance, about your experiences.

      Do you think a man that has had 300 sexual partners makes a better partner and capable of being a loyal, caring partner?
      Would you be angry with a husband who wasn’t honest about his past but you found out?

    2. Jessie, you, like everyone else should live your life to suit yourself. Men have hundreds of women and it seems that even women are OK with it. Sex is something that we should enjoy and have experience with it as often as possible. I myself am 49 years old and truly enjoy men of all ages. I seldom date just one man because they soon start trying to control my every move. I have several men friends and date them all and this works best for me. I guess my number is somewhere around 80 men and including 3 women. The women were as I was going thru a courious stage. I have never been a prostitute but love being with men and a few threesomes with girlfriends. My advice is to never tell anyone just how many men you have had. Jessie, don’t be fooled by other womens hateful words, they most likely have had many partners also. Most of my women friends have had many men just like me. Women are the biggest hypocrites on earth !!

  67. I honestly feel 1000x better I’m turning 19 and I’ve had sex with 6 people, and I am definitely not proud of it…. half of those people were ass wipes and it just feels wrong to me I guess, but to each their own.

  68. I stopped counting at 120…I know that makes me a man whore but I really could careless…I’m a great lover and my Fiancee has reaped those benefits and I have all those woman I’ve had sex with to thank for that…also…I haven’t told her to complete truth about my number…I told her 15…I feel bad about that sometimes but I don’t feel like that number matters…what matters is that I’m in a great loving relationship 38th the girl of my dreams…and whatever number I had in the past doesn’t matter because from here on out it’s just going to be 1…her…my queen

    1. If you don’t feel like the number matters you should have told her before you got serious let alone engaged. This does not bode well for the marriage; building it on a lie.

  69. Until i was 32 i had only 1 partner, not im 46 it is close to 200. And i feel its fine for me in my life.

  70. I’ve been married for 25 years and have been 100% loyal. My wife and I have sex about 3 times a week (except when it is that time of month). Before we might have drinks on the couch watching TV and after we snuggle and fall asleep. There is a lot of trust, comfort and safe feelings. So my wife and I estimate we have had all sorts of sex, with each other, about 3,000 times. I really don’t understand having so many partners………a stranger is a stranger, no trust, no comfort…..no matter how hot they are……………

  71. Wow these responses!! I don’t know if these people are trolls or psychopaths!! And people not thinking 30+ is a high number ROFL!!! I don’t know what is worse, your high number or your complete obliviousness to it being a high number likely pointing to some mental deficiency. I know news/society talks about all this loose sex everyone is supposedly having but studies consistently point out very low sex partners for most of the population. To each their own but good luck finding love that lasts longer than a fortnight!

    1. I personally think you’re being way too judgmental here.

      First of all, some people will not stay married to you no matter how decent you are to them. They just want out. This happened to me.
      Plus, my second wife died of chronic health issues.

      In between I’ve had several girlfriends, relationships that lasted as long as four years that did not culminate in marriage , but sometimes you date somebody for a few months, sleep with them just once, and then they don’t want to see you again. It just happens. You don’t have to be ugly, or fat, or stupid, or bad in bed for them to decide that they just want to spend the rest of their lives with something different, something they haven’t found yet.

      And people answering this question are from all age groups. I would think anybody who was young in the 1970s and did not grow up with an oppressive religious upbringing would have a higher score.

  72. My number is 37 or perhaps a bit less. too long ago and fuzzy details. I’m 43, married with kids. Husband has been my only partner since i met him in 1998. I was serial monogamy in my early 20’s. It wasn’t a conscious choice, I never cheated. It just came about. Part fun, part escape from severe abuse growing up, part drunk parties. Never slept with a taken guy but did BJ guy w/ gf after strip poker.

    yet my mom and someone else spread untrue rumors and now everyone i know and thousands i don’t know gossip and shun me forever. i wrote a book about it. should i publish it?

    promiscuous people aren’t bad people. they’re just humans. they need love and support. some of them enjoy their ways and there’s nothing wrong with that.

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  74. 30 years of age, 3 long relationships (3-4) years, one one-night stand which i didnt like, so adds up to 4 partners for now, i just love being with a girl i really like and having lots of sex with her all the time, i certainly have enjoyed all 3 relationships, its a bit hard to find someone these days who wants a similar relationship, a lot of women I openly asked about said they want to be pounded by different guys, i dont judge its just hard for me to find what suits me

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